#he's so done with everyone's bullshit and i love that for him me too
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Felt yall deserved a
TEACHER AU
More below the cut!!
Please keep in mind some of these are just my headcanons and how i see the characters!! This was also wrote like ages ago lol
shifters
Milo - tech and design teacher who you either love or hate but he is the coolest one
David - principal, everyone is shit scared, like if mr shaw enters your class you KNOW someones done wrong, one time someone seen him at the gym… one other time they seen him with the preschool kids
Asher - super chill math teacher who brings in biscuits on a friday so you can have a snack while you work
Darlin - pe teacher, teaches the girls netball team, and the boys hockey, as well as the mixed running team, darlin does it all.
Sweetheart - guidance counsellor / vice principal
Angel - pre-school teacher (ANGEL TEACHES CAELUM. ANGEL TEACHERS CAELUM.)
Baabe - super sweet home ec teacher whos classroom you can sit in at lunch, they specilise in dessert and sweet treats, rumour has it that they bake the math teachers favorite for valentines day in class, rumour yet to be confirmed
Vampires
sam - tech-and-design teacher, is missing one finger and tells every year a different horror story as to why
Vincent - drama teacher. But like that drama teacher whos like “this isnt MY preformance! Im not going on the stage to make a mockery of myself”
porter - math teacher who gives too much homework (and is a bit of a “jerk” outside of class yet none of the students hate him.) (bar me i hate porter.)
Lovely - biology teacher.
Treasure - learning for life and work (specifically personal development, why? Cus that has a gay topic and you cannot say they dont have a power point with “teachers you can discuss this with” that has pronouns and pride flags, and if anyone dARES make a joke im their class you will be tore apart like your chicken)
Un-emp group
guy - english teacher who everyone KNOWS IS GAY. I mean look at that dude! (This is just a personal gay headcanon, he still totally teachs english)
geordi - guidance counsellor who makes sure all the kids get into the courses they want to get the careers they want
honey - english classroom assistant specifically because guy takes the bigger classes
Damn Group
Damien - chemistry teacher who does the “fireworks experiment” with the first years (11-12) the halloween-week before they go off of school
Huxley - pe teacher who takes the after school (american) football team
Gavin - librarian who is in the english teachers classroom a little too often…
Lasko - the physics teacher that everyone is like “oh dont worry about the homework he wont care” however one time dear overheard and proceeded to tear these children a new hole in the ground
Dear - teaches home-ec and makes extra to offer to the kids who seem a little “too keen” to be cooking something to eat in school, takes no bullshit
Freelancer - english teacher that everyone thinks is gay as shit, some seniors have claimed to see them kissing the librarian
#redacted asmr#redacted audio#shady headcanons#redacted shaw pack#redacted headcanons#redacted au#redacted damn crew#redacted solaire clan
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I wanna reblog this with a counter-opinion and not to argue the validity of yours- because I honestly felt the same at first.
Now, I'm not elbow deep in Invincible discourse, much less knowledged on the comics. All my information came from the TV series and some vague internet articles. Take my shit with a grain of salt. Also, this might end up gibberish, so bear with me lol.
Now, at first I will admit I was the same. It felt off and weird in the beginning of S3 because that wasn't what I experienced from Cecil or the Guardians myself. What helped me is if you look at this in Cecil's perspective and what he'd experienced with Nolan, he had every right to behave how he did with Mark. Even all badass and stoic, he's still (mostly) human. Sure, the decisions he made weren't all that ethical, much less ones I'd make myself, but he's not wrong about them as shitty as it sounds. "You can either be the good guy, or save the world- you can't do both." He was in the same mindset as Mark in his own youth before imprisonment, and it changed when he realized that the world might be in more danger than he bargained for.
Mark on the other hand, is still practically a kid. He's dealt with so much in such a short time- like, what, 2 years? He's 19 now and 17 when he got his powers and started training. Between then, it was like a lifetime of bullshit came hitting him in the face. Of course his crash outs are justified. But he is still a Viltrumite. His father's race is an aggressive warmonger race- they intentionally are vicious and merciless. When they're angry, the get ANGRY.
That's why Cecil had done the things he did- he doesn't want another Nolan incident. And with Oliver aging so quickly and being partially Viltrumite, he doesn't have the time to learn morals like Mark did. That's another problem Cecil has to work with. I don't know how much you've seen on this season, but Oliver is indeed a problem if Debbie and Mark can't get through to him easily. (Although, so far it seems that Oliver is doing mostly fine in the morality department, so props to him and them fr. Love these guys to death lol)
It's a lot to take in if you don't really know much about just how bad the Viltrumites are. Everyone is scared of them. They are quite literally an unstoppable infestation of near god-like aliens hellbent on taking over the universe.
Now to the Guardians.
Them splitting up was not on my bingo card, but it seemed rational. Most of the team were younger people anyways- Rae, Rudy, Rex, etc. They're all Mark's friends- they're gonna side with him no matter what unless GDA decides otherwise. (Staring at the Immortal and Kate, I am not fond of them.)
I will admit- they all are rational in their own making. They come in to see one of their own being tortured by an unsolicited and invasive device. It's honestly the only thing that could keep Mark at bay since he is far weaker than Nolan but still pretty fucking strong. However- the others know Cecil is doing what he can with what he has (Darkwing, the bots, etc) to help make the world safer. Sure, maybe what he's doing is inethical, but everyone seems to be... less inclined to crime. Cecil's predecessor tried to get that through to him too- and that's why he came to the same conclusion after taking over the prison and reforming most of the guys there.
I have more but my brain took a shit right here lol- if I have more to say, then I'll add. Sorry if my reblog came off weird- I just really like Invincible and discussing shit abt it.
idk if this is a hot take or a widely shared consensus bc i havent been in the invincible fandom until like. yesterday maybe, but can i just say why is everyone suddenly so insane and stupid this season. like their level of rage and violence feels so out of character to me that when mark got all mad about darkwing and the other guy and started going crazy i was straight up convinced that they were about to reveal that overirritability was a symptom of the venom from those centipede things and i was like screaming at the tv the whole time like "why is nobody questioning the giant gaping hole in his chest with weird green goop pouring out of it" and then all of the sudden cecil was being like antagonising against mark for it and then i spent the whole episode just confused af why everyone was acting wild and rash and never using their words or brains to the point that by the end of it i had a headache. like i can reframe it in my head with analysis and stuff in retrospect in order to still be able to enjoy and appreciate the canon of a show i like, but like. rly bad first impressions anyway. i thought they were gonna pull something akin to the art gallery car in infinity train but it just never happened bwuh. and then, the argument between the guardians afterwards just worsened it all because all the dialogue felt like they were just pushing the plot forward, using it as a means to an end to get the guardians to split up, with like little to no regard for the actual characters. and also the way everyone on marks side treated him after all gave like therapyspeak joker i swear. and then the stupid ass unstoppable constant miscommunication rage kept going to with oliver because why the hell were they constantly just yelling at this kid and never putting their words together in any remotely effective way ever. yk honestly maybe its always been kinda like this but i watched it all in like 4 days so the drastic shift felt really noticable to me. idrk. explode me if im wrong
#invincible series#amazon invincible#Invincible discussion#mark grayson#mark invincible#cecil stedman#oliver grayson
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The Bucks thought they were getting happy go with the flow best friend Hangman. When really they got depressed alcoholic does whatever the fuck he wants Hangman. And I think the dynamic going forward is incredibly beautiful.
#he's so done with everyone's bullshit and i love that for him me too#we've never been so fucking back dawg I'm crying and cumming#hangman adam page#aew#aew lb
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There's honestly... just so many people, just so so so so so many people in this world where I'm like... aren't you people tired of this fucking... you know, I was going to call them clowns but that's really disrespectful to clowns, these people could never get their face on an egg...
Anyway, aren't you tired of this childish jackass? Don't you just want to ignore them and never have to hear about them again? If we just ignored them they legitimately would go away... don't you want that?
And this applies to... just ungodly amounts of people, from jake paul to even elon musk (just... don't touch his shit, he'll run out of money eventually with how bad he is with it), to just... name an annoying famous person and you'll name someone I've literally forgotten right now that I could never have to hear about again if people would just ignore them (unless they committed crimes, investigators are welcome to pay attention while gathering a case)
Yet the answer's always "no, we're paying so much attention to them!" and I'm just like... why? Why would you watch jake paul box? I heard about that and was like "he's still doing that shit?", and yet I guess it made a lot of money yet again and it's just like... ignore him
These people could go away, and yet
#to be blunt this is also very very very much about trump#the best part of all if he'd lost is how I'd never have had to see or hear about his loser ass again#and you people couldn't even manage that (collective you; not you personally... unless you're Pennsylvanian basically)#like he's insufferable... unless you're a die hard fan of him you know he's just stupid and annoying#why would you want to hear a washed up reality star for four more fucking years?#we could ignore these people hard enough to make them go away#and yet I'll be stuck having to hear him say shit about Hannibal or whatever for four more years cause you couldn't do that#I'm so sick of it; I honestly am#jake paul could have been ignored into obscurity like a decade ago; and yet he's able to launch a scam with mr beast#like dear god... can't you people find something better to do than watch these people? ...like watch paint dry?#it's not just people; it's every live action disney remake; it's... it's just all of it... fucking ai#can't you people fucking ignore it? can't you just kinda boo when it shows up and then forget about it?#I get someone like elon is a toddler that needs an eye kept on him to make sure he's not breaking shit but like...#we could just not buy his cars... which... like... doesn't seem like a hard ask given how badly they're manufactured#again... weirdos on tumblr; I'm doubting you're to blame for most of this#but just like... could we just for the love of god let the stupid shit die out you losers?#I'm not even... I'm not even joking here; this isn't like a goof; this is a prescription#nfts die if literally everyone ignores them; live action remakes die if no one watches them; elon goes bankrupt if no one buys from him#(also gets really sad because he's a massive attention seeker; and that's pretty funny so bonus)#why do I still have to hear about jake paul other than like... 'he's been arrested for fraud' or something reasonable?#could have been done with him years ago... like maybe if you kept around one or two bad habits but... like the lootboxes couldn't go?#tune in; turn on; drop out... this part here; I'm asking you to do the drop out part#drop out of society and stop playing their bullshit games#pay attention; be engaged with the world and your community as best you can; and just stop... stop giving this shit oxygen#but again... if this isn't hitting the void it's probably hitting the choir... you're not an oaf on twitter sucking this stuff up#but fuck me... worry over tariffs and other shit aside; concrete quantifiable worries I can lay out I might add#for the people who act like it's just sky is falling mentality; nah... I can expressly say what and why I worry about come january#but all that aside... you couldn't have voted against him just... just to never hear his annoying ass again?#not saying harris would have been good or bad or anything else... I'm saying she would have been a fuck of a lot less annoying#and like... you gave elon a win too... the two most annoying people on the planet and ya couldn't just... not
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there's normal thought exercise questions to be had about fave charas like 'what would your fave do in X situation' or 'does your fave like Y why or why not' but the most important question to me i could ever answer about my faves is 'do they like shadow the hedgehog and is it purely ironic or do they have all 326 route titles memorized'
#snap chats#'snap can you go three minutes without mentioning shadow' No its my brand at this point. hes in the pfp i gotta mention him once a week#anyway listen to me. its because its my favorite question and answering Who Likes Shadow is good for character analysis <- bullshitting#understanding shadow the hedgehog is something done by few as is so thats why its esp funny to think bout other charas's thoughts on him#i think its just funny to think about all these 40-70 y/o men getting In Too Deep about an anthropomorphic alien hedgehog#on the real tho i love Thought Exercise Questions when it comes to fave charas...#its a good way for me to stop and reflect on a chara and make sure i still have their character in mind whenever i go to portray them#i be asking these questions every day over the dumbest shit you can think of like 'who basically lives off an air fryer'#silly things like that..... plus then i make tier lists in my mind... fun organization games for the mentally unsound...#ok im drawing for myself now bye#i just needed to remind everyone im thinking of sonic. which i SHOULD make a blog for#but like i'll prob never make sonic fanart or talk about it that deeply- not consistently enough to make a blog for it#ok bye bye ill be back with actual rgg content and then you guys can remember why you followed me in the first place LMAO
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I’m just going to work on accepting that what I do want romantically IS a Friendship and Life Partnership and Marriage in every way that matters.
I’m just asexual.
And I’ve always been transparent about it.
#tiger’s roar#i love him. i don’t have to question that he likes me too.#and…I’m done trying to pavlov’s dog or gaslighting myself about things I don’t want For The Future TM#i love him because of who he is (that I get to see. that i see evidence of. knowing that there’s More he isn’t letting me see)#i love him because he both prolly accidentally became the catalyst to rediscover myself again and grow#but also because he stubbornly insists on that.#despite the distance he still holds me at ‘cause of his own issues and needing my reassurance that I can Stay Here until he changes it#he’ll close the distance I feel I have to take to keep us both safe. or because I’m afraid then owning up to that#it’s this…prolly to everyone else and with Good Reason this weird yoyo effect#or…two binary stars in a pushpull that’ll eventually collide and merge#I think we’re both afraid but gradually accepting that tbh#but…realizing the sort of relationship I want is…basically a marriage without Hiarchal Heteronormative Patriarchal Bullshit#that makes me feel so so trapped just want to flee would rather be alone#I…for once��don’t feel so…trapped. that I’ll wake up with regret and feel boxed into a barbie box and trapped in a silent scream without air#that instead…life feels actually manageable. I can draw strength from myself. and rest from him.
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godddd i will just never get the appeal of bucky/sam to me it is the equivalent of putting like. jim and dwight in a romantic relationship which I’m sure a lot of people do but STILL at least there’s more substance there
#had hoped this fic saying minor would be a blink and you miss it reference but no#it was soooo unnecessary to the story too like could’ve just been fatws compliant without that since the focus was yelena#it would’ve been such a lovely fix it otherwise OH and untagged got implications of stevenat in the end#which i at least understand more bc there is a depth there obvs but they’re so platonic to me#just do not understand why this author seems to have abandoned stucky for these ships#like you have done the endgame fix it shit and yet#lol you know how people would talk about what peggy would think about steve and sharon#like imagine steve coming back to that bullshit of bucky and sam#think I’d be like hey don’t think I’ve forgotten how you were a huge asshole to bucky when he was traumatized in cacw#which dear god i wish people would acknowledge#i enjoyed the humor of their barbs at the time but eventually it was like#on the mcu is gonna have everyone mistreat bucky forever apparently#and make it seem like he is a villain despite all evidence he didn’t choose to do those things#meanwhile fandom woobifies actual villains i hate it#also oh my god ik this happened in canon but having sam call him buck? absolutely not lmao that is literally a steve specific thing#idk maybe fatws did give them depth they didn’t have before it’s not like i would know#just what i gleaned it didn’t seem like it and even so#to me they both will always have more meaningful relationships with steve than each other#and people just jumped on board bc they view sam and bucky as a replacement for those relationships#and i just do not see how that can work and it seems to take away from all three characters and those relationships to do that
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man they rlly said we are going to make your grocery store experience so miserable and hangry bc the rest of your day will be so overwhelmingly good we need to balance it out brother. and wow it rlly was great what a 180
#lee’s bullshit#art was great pre grocery store too my prints turned out rlly good and I started on my next project#then in studio I had three separate incredibly kind interactions regarding my project#first where a guy referenced a project I did FRESHMAN YEAR that I didn’t even remember to back me up I was so honored#genuinely like wow so so cool to hear that project stuck w him like that . what an angel#the second was when everyone in the group was arguing over a different local building during my presentation#a guy in the front turned to me and started quietly asking me questions about my design and giving advice on what I should do next#which was also so appreciated bc everyone had been talking over me and he had good points too#then third once I was done and filling up my water my old friend passed me on the stairs#and said come see me I have a building you need to see for your project#which was also a) so cool that he’d think of smth for me and b) v sweet since we haven’t been close since first semester#and he showed me a building w rlly cool unique comments on how I could apply parts of it which I rlly appreciated#then we talked abt radio too bc I had been thinking abt asking him and this opened that door !! so so great#this semester has been so much better in terms of making friends and talking to people thank fucking god#and then in my history class I knew two obscure answers (random building and doctor who (thank u smith)) which was great#and my class crush is back in that class which is also great 👍#overall big improvement to my day thank you everyone :]#if you read this far I love and miss you all <3 take care#ALSO found out our friend who came from scotland to work in my town this summer is going to come back next year thank god !!!!!#another huge win for the me community in so happy <33
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Part Five
Can't stop thinking about the attempt of reconciliation and reader ain't having it. Our girl is going to be wilddddd y'all. Also goodnight. See y'all tomorrow (maybe)
You call Meredith when you get home.
You. Are. Fuming. She's not sure she can ever remember a time you using so many swear words at one time.
How fucking dare them? Immature? You're the immature one? You were the one trying your best to salvage four failing relationship meanwhile none of those assholes could be bothered to try and keep one. They had one person to manage: you.
"I wanna go out this weekend." "Wear something tight and borderline risk indecent exposure."
"You know what I always say," Meredith begins. "The best way to get over someone-"
"is to get under someone else." You finish. You weren't exactly keen on the idea of bringing someone to your bed just yet, but a little attention would do you some good. "I don't want to fuck someone just yet." You admitted. "I'm more on the getting drunk and making out."
"I didn't know we resorted back secondary school heavy petting?" She teased.
"University, Dear." You corrected. "I didn't peak until after I graduated."
"No." She argued. "You didn't put your books down long enough to realize that boys actually wanted to fuck you." You were glad she couldn't see you roll your eyes. "Saturday work for you? I have a late night Friday and won't be up for it."
"That works."
"Sorry." She apologized. "I plan on getting you absolutely smashed so I need to be ready to play the nanny. I know how you love to get drunk and run off."
It was true. You had always found it hilarious when you were drunk to just run. Quite literally run away. It got to a point during university where Meredith would handcuff you to her so you didn't stray.
"I won't run." Your sober mind promised.
"Uh huh." Meredith's tone told you that she knew that was a load of shit. "I'll text Tabs. Let her know the plan."
The next day at the shop was pretty uneventful. No more unexpected visitors. You still had them all blocked. Not caring if now they decided to offer up some bullshit apology.
Months. This had been a steady decline for six months. A text or a simply sorry won't fix this. You weren't sure anything could.
But it didn't matter. You were done and they obviously were too.
You had picked up enough take out to feed a family, but you didn't plan on making your lunch before work or cooking when you got home. The rest of the week you planned on just going through the motions until you could go out Saturday and hopefully get everything out.
You weren't paying attention as you walked down the hallway to your flat. Fishing in your purse for keys. You were at almost at your door when you saw him.
Sitting next to your door was a familiar face. A face you felt you haven't seen in forever.
“What are you doing here, Kyle?" Your voice was flat as you continued to blindly try and find your keys with one hand. Fuck. You really need to clean out your purse...
“My key wouldn’t work.” He explained. "So I’m out here.”
"I'm aware why you're not in my apartment since I changed the locks," you said, trying to keep your irritation at bay. "What I am asking is why did you come here?"
"You won't return any of our messages."
"You're all blocked, so technically I didn't really get any messages." "Besides, you don't get to complain to me about not responding to texts, Kyle Garrick." Your fingers finally wraps around them. God bless. "If you're here for your things, it'll have to wait. I have to sort through everyone's shit and I don't know whose is whose."
"We need to talk." He explains as you put the key into the lock, opening the door.
"Nah," you say scrunching your nose in that way he used to adore. "I'm good. But you can swing by tomorrow and pick up your things if you'd like." You say before trying to shut the door on him. You were stupid in thinking you could be faster than him.
Dammit.
"I know things haven't been good and I've definitely could have been better,'' he admits. "But can you at least try and let us apologize? Let us try and work it out."
"No." You answered, trying to close the door. Not caring if you had to resort to kicking his shins to get him out.
"Why not?" He countered.
“Maybe because I've already tried, Kyle?” You gave up on trying to shut him out. You were strong, but he didn't have any issues in besting you. “Because I actually tried with you. With all of you. You didn’t need to come here giving me excuses about your life being hectic because I’ve made the excuses for you.” You didn't miss how he practically flinched. He had always blamed his busy life. Family. Work. You stopped caring about whatever excuse he gave you and realized it was just that. An excuse. “I’ve been telling myself for months that everything you guys didn’t do for me wasn’t because you didn’t care about me. It was because of the stress of your deployments is the reason none of you tell me when you get back from until it’s time to fuck. I tell myself it’s because of the fucked up situation of me being with all of you that makes it awkward to meet your families. Families you all have that I now know I’m not worthy of meeting.” He wanted to correct you. You were. You were worthy. He was an idiot. “It’s not that I need your excuses to make me feel like what you did was justified. No matter what it was, it was apparently to you because you did it.”
He took a step back, processing everything you had said. He had been selfish. You were the reliable constant in his life. Someone he believed he never disappointed. Someone he couldn't disappoint no matter how many times he fucked up.
You took the opportunity to slam the door. Quickly turning the lock before he had a chance to open it back up.
God...
That felt good.
You had spent that evening collecting their thing in case Kyle did show back up tomorrow. You wouldn't make their lives easier by sorting all their shit and organizing it. Everything. One box. Let them figure it out. You almost had a mind to add a shirt that you knew didn't belong to any of them just to have them argue over it. Or least make them think there was someone else...
You were almost tempted if not for the premise that you wanted them to realize this was their fault. Their fuck up. But now that you were officially all broken up, you were free game.
#captain john price#kyle gaz garrick#simon ghost riley#call of duty#john soap mactavish#angst with a happy ending#angst#grovel#jealousy
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Another load of Jealousy - Yunho x f!reader
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Summary: Yunho isn't about to even entertain the idea of his girlfriend talking to another man. It doesn't matter how many loads of love, care, and cum it takes to make her remember that she is his and he is hers. Genre: smut (mdni!!!) Pairings: bf!Yunho x f!reader Tags/Warnings: SMUT MDNI, mean dom!yunho (kinda sweet after some time), sub!reader, fingering(?), penetration, unprotected sex, established relationship, jealousy, possessiveness, breeding kink, choking, bulge (lmk if something is missing, I have never done this) A/N: This is the 3rd smut I've ever written in my life... I haven't posted the first two since they were written a couple years ago and were bad, so I hope this is worth posting. The plot isn't anything great because this was mostly for trying to see what it's like to write smut and I didn't want to waste a good plot on this if this turned out bad LOLLL. So please, keep in mind that I've almost never written smut! Word count: 2 300 ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ If someone asked you if you loved Yunho, you’d answer ‘yes’ in a heartbeat. He was more than just a lover or a boyfriend; he was your worshipper, kissing the ground you walked on. And if someone asked you if you’d ever cheat on him, you’d give a firm ‘no’ and tell the person off. Although you wanted to make it clear to everyone you were Yunho’s girl because you loved him, it wasn’t the only reason to push people away. You’d be in big trouble if he started to consider the possibility of you holding affectionate feelings for anyone else than him.
“Baby, what are you doing? ~”
Despite Yunho’s needy tone and presence next to you on the couch, you couldn’t tear your gaze off of your phone.
“Wait a second, Yuyu,” you murmured.
He watched as your fingers tap-danced on the small screen, obviously writing a message to someone. Someone who was robbing him of your attention. Your eyes reflected the light coming from the phone screen but Yunho’s eyes shone with something else. He was getting frustrated.
“Please, I’m lonely,” he whined, his hand creeping up on your thigh, trying to go unnoticed yet wanting desperately for you to pay attention to him.
Still, you didn’t even glance at him. It was subtle but Yunho noticed how you tried to hide your phone screen, leaning away ever so slightly.
The longer your attention was on the mysterious person you were talking to, the angrier Yunho became.
You felt him squeeze your thigh, silently demanding you to finally look at him in the eyes. It was a final warning. Only when his long fingers dug onto your inner thigh, you turned to face him.
“Who are you talking to?”
Yunho’s icy voice shouldn’t have surprised you – this was nothing new, given his possessive nature. And like always, while it made you nervous, it also caused your pussy to clench around nothing. You couldn’t help but get horny when he looked like he’d devour you any second now.
“Just work stuff,” you murmured, taking a glance at his hand. No matter how many times his beautiful fingers had been inside you, reaching the deepest, sweetest spots, you just couldn’t get enough.
“At this hour? That’s bullshit.”
While Yunho’s eyes were cold, they were undeniably burning with both fury and lust. You knew the look way too well just like he knew your body.
“I’m friends with him so I feel comfortable texting him even in the evening. It’s just about a work project.”
“Him?” Yunho’s eyes narrowed.
You were too nervous to break eye contact with him, but you didn’t need to see to feel his hand hover over your core, so close but so far. Even though he was barely touching you, he was probably able to feel how your wetness seeped through your night shorts.
“Please, Yunho... Don’t tease me,” you let out a quiet whine, hoping it’d persuade Yunho into touching you.
Immediately, he pulled you roughly into a kiss. In a normal situation he would have kept you begging for him, but right now his desire and anger towards you were too much to handle for both of you. His lips claimed yours and showed no mercy or signs of going easy on you. You were enthusiastic to kiss him back, but his need to have you was even stronger.
The way he started nearly biting on your lips would have soon left bruises, if you hadn’t pulled away. The both of you were breathing heavily after the intense moment, but Yunho wasted no time in trying to rest.
“Who is that coworker? A friend you say?”
You felt your pussy get wetter by his demanding words and you tried your best to give him an answer – one that would satisfy him enough yet encourage him to fuck you senseless.
“We’re not close, but enough to be considered friends-! Yunho!..”
He interrupted you with his fingers suddenly under your clothing, circling your clit.
“What do you need friends for when I’m here? Don’t I give you all you need?”
You squirmed around at the movements of Yunho’s skillful hands. It was hard not to feel even slightly embarrassed; you didn’t want him to know how aroused his possessiveness made you.
“Y-You can’t do work projects for me... I need him.”
Your choice of words pushed the wrong buttons in Yunho, and he took his hand out of your panties. He didn’t care when you whined at the loss of contact, just pure jealousy burning in his eyes.
“You say you need him? Baby, I’m all you need,” his voice was low and dangerous, “There’s nothing and no-one else.”
It didn’t take long for him to have dragged you into the bedroom, his fingers wrapped around your wrist in a bruising grip. You tried to savor every moment despite knowing there were more to come after this.
The streetlights outside were the only source of light in your dim bedroom. It took a moment for your eyes to adjust to the darkness, but apparently Yunho saw well enough to push you onto the bed. Maybe he wouldn’t have cared anyways if he had pushed you accidentally on the floor. Whenever he got like this, satisfying his need to claim you was the top priority.
“Strip.”
You immediately started taking off your nightwear which you had just changed to after shower. Your hair was still damp and smelling like your shampoo. It was definite you’d have to take a shower again after this – preferably with Yunho.
“You’re too slow,” he scolded. The way he started pulling your shorts and panties off was surprisingly gentle; even though he was mad at you, he was still your mere worshipper and saw you as his goddess.
Finally, when you saw him properly, your breath caught in your throat. He wasn’t standing, just on his knees on the bed, but his height was still intimidating. You loved it though. You loved every moment of this, and your pussy throbbed with desire to have him fill you up to the brim.
His chest was heaving with anticipation, and although seeing it bare always excited you, your eyes were fixated on that cock of his.
“I-It’s bigger than I remembered...”
“You’re going to take it nonetheless. You don’t deserve this after how you’ve acted but I need this now,” Yunho stated, his tone leaving no room for discussion.
You felt like a prey, his next meal, as you watched him crawl closer on the bed and lay you down rather harshly. The intense eye contact just added to the arousal you felt leaking out of you. You needed him so bad, and your legs spread open automatically to give him way to your core that was aching for him.
“You need a damn reminder every week of who you belong to. I don’t know if I want you to stop teasing me like that or not,” Yunho whispered, his right hand finding its way to your neck, “At least I get to fuck you like this.”
He turned your gaze back up to him by gripping your neck, when you tried to look at his cock. You managed to see how its tip was covered in clear precum. It was as hard as it always was when you had moments like this, if not even harder. You wondered how it had ever managed to fit inside you with the impressive girth and length.
“Look at me in the eyes. I want you to look at me clearly so you’ll remember my face every time you talk to another man.”
You didn’t have time to process Yunho’s words. As he pushed his cock inside you, it was impossible to think about anything else than him. Although you were as wet as ever for him, it was still almost hard to take him in. No matter how many times he had made love to or fucked you, no matter how fast and rough or slow and romantic, he stretched you up nicely every time.
“My girl. My baby,” Yunho muttered more to himself than to you. His hips had started moving some time ago already, but only now you were coming down back to Earth.
His hand was on your neck like to use it to support himself, but the grip was still somewhat gentle. It tightened every time he thrusted in, and the lack of air just made you lose your mind in the pleasure even more.
Your walls were slippery and starting to adjust to his size, so he slid inside with ease. It didn’t mean there was no delicious friction left though.
“Who do you belong to? Him or me?” he growled into your ear. Although the pace of his hips had grown faster, he made sure to push deep inside you, drawing out every moan he could get from you.
Your attempt to answer was cut off quickly as Yunho’s hands started squeezing your throat. It would have been hard to breathe even if you weren’t breathless already from having him ram your insides.
“Answer me. A little choking shouldn’t shut you up like this.”
Again, you tried to tell Yunho that you were only his to love, fuck, and take care of. But he held your throat tighter again, clearly teasing you. It was impossible to win this game, and you loved it that way.
A mocking smirk spread on Yunho’s lips, “You don’t have to say it. I know you’re mine by the way I’m the only who ever gets to be balls deep inside you.”
He released your neck and pressed his hand lightly on your lower stomach. It was no secret that your boyfriend’s cock was big, but the way you could see a clear bulge, the way your lower abdomen moved up and down with Yunho’s thrusts, made you clench down on him.
“F-Fuck... You make it so hard to stay mad at you,” he groaned out.
You watched his eyebrows furrow as if he was holding back. Finally, you had been able to catch your breath, although it was still difficult due to his relentless thrusts.
“I love you. I’m yours, Yunho...”
Your pleasured admission not only softened his heart a bit but made him even more lustful. He knew you were his. If you tried to leave him, he’d find a way to make you stay – even with force if necessary. But hearing you say out loud once again that you were his satisfied him.
“I know. I know, my pretty girl, and I love you too,” his eyes met yours in a gentle way even.
A loud moan slipped past your lips as Yunho’s fingers found your clit, finally continuing what he had started on the couch in the living room. Circling, pressing, and pinching on it – he did it all. Your sensitive skin tingled and almost felt like on fire.
“W-Will you fill me up?” you grasped at the sheets under you, making them all rumpled and look unkempt. They were dirty anyways due to the sweating.
Yunho moved your hands on his shoulders. There was nothing more that he wanted than to see your nail scrapes on his skin, a mark of who he belonged to.
“I’ll fill you up, baby. My cum will be leaking out,” he looked at you before turning his eyes to his cock, slightly amused, “I’ll just fuck a new load tomorrow then. You’ll have my babies in no time.”
His talk about breeding you brought you closer to your release, and he definitely noticed it by the way your pussy squeezed his thick cock.
“Look at your pussy, how it’s clenching down on me. It likes to be bred, huh?”
“Yunho, I-I'm close... so close,” you whimpered, gripping his shoulders like they were your savior. But you knew nothing could save you from the climax you were reaching quickly.
Yunho smiled down at you a bit cockily, “Have I made clear who you belong to?”
“Yes!” you whined, thighs trembling.
“And who do you belong to, baby?”
If you weren’t in such a state of mind-blowing pleasure, you could have teased him on purpose and said the name of your coworker. However, now that you were so close to coming, you couldn’t ruin this.
“You! You, Yunho!..”
A genuine, sweet smile tugged the corners of his lips slightly upwards. By looking at his furrowed eyebrows, it was clear he was holding back as well, near to orgasm but fighting back for your sake.
And Yunho knew your body so well, that he recognized your sounds of enjoyment and body language, so that just when you reached the peak, he closed the distance between your lips. Your cries of pure pleasure were muffled by his mouth.
His body shook and it didn’t take long for him to go over the edge, to let out a few stifled groans. Hot cum spurted out inside you, filling you just like Yunho had promised.
“So, you’re going to block that man’s number, right?” Yunho mumbled, his head lying down on your chest. He could hear your heart beating rapidly after the intense session but eventually calming down to steady, slow beats.
You chuckled, caressing his hair slightly damp from the sweat, “I can’t block my coworker’s number.”
A surprised and disappointed whine fell past your lips as Yunho got up and pulled his now softened cock out of you. He looked down at your pussy, watching with glee how his fresh cum leaked out. There was a lot of it still inside you, but it wasn’t enough for him. Nothing was ever enough for him when it came to you.
“I guess you can take another load then.”
#kpop fanfic#kpop x reader#ateez#ateez x reader#ateez fanfic#ateez fic#jeong yunho x reader#jeong yunho#jeong yunho smut#ateez smut#ateez x y/n#ateez x female reader#ateez x you#ateez hard thoughts#ateez hard hours#yunho x reader#yunho smut#ateez yunho#yunho hard thoughts#yunho hard hours#yunho ateez
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okay y’all, we are jumping into this. pornstar!rafe makes a big decision. ⭐️ (thank you to my bae @oceandriveab for her request and being so patient! 💖 )
He had quite literally fucked you to sleep after storming off set all because he couldn’t get his dick up because he had you on his mind. He knew the decision he had to make and that was one he never thought he would ever do and that quit filming professionally. Even if he hadn’t opened up to you much at all, and he was terrified of confessing his feelings to someone he only had ever fucked, he couldn’t continue on with this career because his addiction was now you.
You should have known better than to answer the door because as you woke up the next morning with a sore body, an empty bed and no sign or explanation from Rafe. You should have expected this and him telling you he couldn’t work anymore because he couldn’t get you off his mind was a bunch of bullshit. He told you from the start he loved pussy too much to ever quit, and you should have stopped falling for him right there. You may been acting on high emotions, but you picked up your phone and began texting him.
Rafe’s phone had been on silent when he had met with his agent and manager. He flat out told them that he was done and they laughed, an amused look on both of their faces. The ‘pussy slayer’ was retiring at 30? There was no way. Everyone knew how much he loved pussy, I mean.. what else was he gonna do? Even if he hadn’t told you much about him, or knew much about you, he knew what he felt for you was enough for him to find a new purpose in life. He knew he said he needed to take baby steps because this was all new to him, but he was tired of the jealousy he constantly felt, the way he couldn’t get you off his fucking mind. He had to show you how he felt and then would let everything fall into place after, it could have been a reckless decision but he didn’t care.
‘I don’t expect a relationship with you, but when you come to my house and tell me that I’m yours just to dip off without any explanation is bullshit Rafe. I can’t do these games with you anymore. You wanna focus on work so bad. Fine. So will I.’
You had blocked him after you sent it, whether it was right or wrong. You didn’t want to, in fact it hurt you to think about Rafe not being in your life. What hurt worse though was how this man had ruined you to the point he never left your mind, that every time he shot a scene with someone else you were filled with nothing but jealousy, and that you couldn’t continue on knowing he would constantly feed you this shit so that he could get a nut in a few times a week. Your insecurities were becoming overshadowed by fear, because you had no idea what Rafe had just done.
You had a feeling you knew who it was by the heavy knocks on your door. You didn’t want to answer and you wanted to tell him to go away. Your own body betrayed you as you began walking over to the door to answer it. He better have a damn good reason on why he was here after his little Houdini act he pulled.
“You wanna block me now?” Rafe asked, stepping through the door without another thought.
You shrugged, arms crossed over your chest as you challenged him. “Why does it matter Rafe? I should have never got my feelings involved with someone who only cares about fucking on camera and getting money from it.” You told him, avoiding his gaze. Maybe it was your own fault because he didn’t know exactly how you felt, but he certainly didn’t make it easy for you. When he whispered sweet shit in your ear it made you feel like you could tell him that you were falling for him. It would then reel back to you being afraid of rejection because he would disappear, or talk about how he loved his career too much to ever quit.
“Do you even know what I was doing? I was firing my agent and my manager because I told them I was done fucking doing porn.” He said, causing your eyes to meet his.
You didn’t believe him. There was no way the man who was obsessed with sex and couldn’t even give you a real reason on why he became a pornstar in the first place had really quit. You laughed, did he really think you were that dumb? “You are lying. You’ve hit an all time low if you think that you can tell me something like that just to fuck me again.” You said with a scoff.
Rafe did a lot of punk shit to try and hide his feelings from you, but this wasn’t something he would joke about. He laughed, shaking his head. “You think I’m lying? I fuckin quit because I love you!” He said, blurting it out before he stopped himself. It was like once he said it, he couldn’t stop the rest from flowing as he continued on. “You don’t understand how hard this is for me! This career is the only thing I have had that has made me feel worth something because I fucked everything else up in my life. This is what made me feel invincible and that I could be somebody. I don’t have anyone else because everyone pushed me away due to my choices. Then I meet you and I don’t even fucking know you, but I feel this insane connection that absolutely terrifies me. It scares me the way I feel about you, and that I really should be taking baby steps. I.. I just can’t though. I don’t want to fuck this up like I did everything else, but… I am fucking in love with you and fucking random girls on camera just to get money isn’t worth losing you over.” He told you.
This was the first time Rafe had ever truly been honest with you and you could read it all over his face. You swallowed the lump in your throat as he stepped closer, taking you by the hands as he pulled you closer. “Let me show you.” He whispered in the softest voice you had ever heard him use. You didn’t know what he meant by that, but there was no way you were turning him away.
No matter how much you loved the brutal sex the two of you shared and we’re sure there was more of that to come, this was an entirely new feeling you both were experiencing. He was being gentle with you for the first time, pouring every ounce of confusing emotions and feelings he had into you. He had you in a deep missionary position, his toned hips grinding into yours as he buried his head in your neck. “You are so goddamn beautiful.” He whispered in a breathy groan.
His cock somehow felt 10 times bigger when he went slow and it was throwing you off at how good this fucking felt. Tears streamed down your face much like the first time he had ever fucked you, but for an entirely different reason. You overwhelmed by love, clinging onto him life a lifeline as you were afraid to let him go. He had ruined you for any other man and right now you were perfectly fine with that. “Rafe… you feel so fucking good..” You whimpered, your eyes rolling back at a little as his tip kept brushing over your g-spot.
Rafe groaned into your smooth skin, his lips traveling across your collarbone and across your jaw line until he met your eyes. He knew he must have really been in love with you because he had never made love and didn’t know he was capable of such a thing. He knew his nasty side was inevitable but he really was determined to show you that he was serious about this.
“Yeah baby, say my fuckin name. That’s yours to say. All yours… my sweet angel.” His words firm but genuine as his lips ghosted over yours. The way you made him feel was better than any drug or any career, and he knew no matter how scary this was for him, you were his girl without a doubt.
The tears flowed even more as he said that, your eyes falling into his ocean ones as his cock explored every inch of you. Your lower tummy fluttered and head spun as you felt an insane orgasm approaching. “Rafe… you’re gonna make me cum. Please don’t stop.. please.” You nearly begged him, manicured nails digging into the skin of his back.
Rafe had always prided himself for being able to go many rounds before cumming. He was so overwhelmed with love, that he knew he was wasn’t going to last long. “I’m not baby, I fuckin got you. Yeah? Cum all over my cock.” He whispered against your lips before pulling you in for a deep kiss.
You couldn’t help but sob at his words, trying your best to focus on the kiss as your orgasm started to take over. You screamed his name, not caring who heard, as this moment was way too important. You shuddered against him, wrapping your legs around his waist to trap him in as his thrusts started to get sloppy. He didn’t know what you had done to him, but he found himself going back to whisper in your ear as he started slowly coming undone. “I’m gonna fuckin fill you up baby, this is all for you..” He breathed out, voice rugged as his nuts tightened and eyes rolled back at your cunt still squeezing him in.
Rafe’s groans were sweet music to your ears as his seed warmed your insides, this time followed by a gentle raspy voice whispering against your skin. “I love you..” He told you, the butterflies hitting your belly and your face breaking out into a beautiful smile.
“I love you.” You whispered back.
Rafe hadn’t said that to someone or heard it back since before he had lost his family. This was the first girl he had ever felt this way about and while the two of you may have been jumping into something that was unclear and had a lot of questions that needed to be answered, he knew this was all worth it.
#rafe cameron#pornstar!rafe#rafe cameron x reader#rafe cameron smut#rafe cameron prompt#rafe cameron blurb#rafe cameron concepts#rafe concepts#outerbanks rafe#rafe outer banks#drew starkey#drew starkey x reader#drew starkey smut#obx#obx smut#outer banks
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lost in wonderland | 𝐩𝐬𝐡
୨୧ pairing: park sunghoon x fem!reader ୨୧ word count: 12k ୨୧ genre: smut, semi-angst, fluff ୨୧ tags: mentions of drug use, fake dating au, rockstar!sunghoon, popstar!reader, enemies to lovers au, jerk to down bad sunghoon, pet names (baby, doll, love, etc.), dirty talk, nipple play, oral (f receiving), belly bulging, spanking, unprotected sex, creampie ୨୧ synopsis: Park Sunghoon, one half of popular rock band Into Eden, is on thin ice with his management and the general public. What does his manager Jay decide to do? Set him up with the leader of rising pop girl group PrismHeart. And while it starts as two stubborn people living in a lie, growing feelings cannot hold anything but the truth. ➸ This one's dedicated to my lovely betas: Ley @pars-ley), Ally @lovetaroandtaemin, Kiki @wonwovy, & Lola @monamipencil)! I'm so grateful to y’all and the love you’ve given this story; I hope everyone else loves it too 🤍 Also the ending song and inspiration for the title is from Boys Like Girls's song "Lost in Wonderland"!
“PARK SUNGHOON: ANOTHER HEARTBREAK UNDER HIS BELT?”
“IS HEESEUNG TIRED OF HIS BANDMATE’S GAMES? IS ‘INTO EDEN’ IN TROUBLE OF DISBANDING?”
“DID SUNGHOON RUIN ANOTHER GIRL GROUP, AND HIS EX’S CAR?”
Sunghoon laughs at the headlines plastered across his manager’s desk. The gossip rags are the only vibrant thing in the office, the monochrome black and white color scheme creating a strict atmosphere that suffocates the rock star to no end. Who knew such bullshit could provide such humor?
The sound dies on Sunghoon’s tongue when he sees Jay’s displeasure pervade the older man’s entire face. His arms are crossed, and Sunghoon can see the veins in Jay’s neck tighten.
“You think this is funny?” Jay asks, his voice even-keeled, but his body language anything but.
“No, Mr. Park.”
“Hoon.” Jay says his talent’s name with admonishment. He sits back down in his chair across from Sunghoon, the large desk separating them. “You know I hate when you call me that.”
“What should I call you, Mr. Park? Bro? Dude? J-Man?”
Jay can’t help the chuckle on his lips, but he shuts it down to go back to the discussion at hand. “Simply put, the label’s pissed. All that we should see two months before your tour is good press, not this shit. And you know Yeji is going to do more than just comment in a couple of tabloids.”
Sunghoon rolls his eyes. “She has nothing to say, besides the fact that it ended mutually.”
“You call making out with Lia ‘ending mutually’?”
Sunghoon raises his hands in defense, a smirk on his lips. “Don’t know what you were told, but that happened after we broke up.”
“Okay, that’s it.” Jay takes the multitude of tabloids and throws them in the trash next to his desk. “The label is going to chop my balls off if I don’t fix the problems you created.”
Sunghoon, in his mind, isn’t a problem child, per se. He simply pales in comparison to his golden boy best friend and musical partner, Lee Heeseung. It isn’t his fault that Heeseung is squeaky clean. The only crazy thing the guy has ever done was dye his hair red for their recent cover shoot.
Sure, Heeseung has been committed to one person for years, long before the two men ever became a name in the public eye. The guy never partakes in recreational activities, choosing to spend his free time with his girlfriend or in video game chat rooms rather than in nightclubs like his counterpart. And he’s always been a media darling, giving signed photos to fans and providing the paparazzi with his undivided attention without complaint.
Sunghoon likes to live without restrictions or red tape. If he has to be judged for that, constantly not measuring up to the pedestal his best friend lives on, so be it.
“It’s time for Plan B,” Jay says, breaking Sunghoon from his thoughts.
After Sunghoon’s brows furrow in confusion, Jay turns on the TV stationed behind his desk. The news video on display shows the members of PrismHeart, the label’s rising girl group, attending the AMAs with bright smiles and matching sparkly ensembles.
“This is Plan B?” Sunghoon asks, releasing a breathless laugh.
“No.” Jay points to you in the center of the LED screen. Your hair billows in the wind as your face shines with the same quality of the cameras capturing your essence on the red carpet.
Sunghoon is taken aback by you without hearing you speak a single word, and he suspects something devious brewing behind his manager’s eyes when he says, “She is.”
The nightclub is packed with D-list celebrities and upcoming starlets, ready to post to their respective social media accounts. With the right touch, the news will work its way to the trending page without fail.
Thankfully, Jay, Sunghoon’s manager, knows how to set the scene for a piece of tabloid fodder. It’s part of his job to make sure that, for better or worse, Sunghoon gets his time in the spotlight.
As for you, all you’re expected to do is mingle with your new “boyfriend,” look pretty in your little black dress, and set the trap.
You asked your own manager, Momo, if you could bring one of the girls along to break the ice and make the “meet cute” look more believable, and both she and Jay agreed.
So here you are, sitting across from Yujin with a strawberry martini in one hand and your cellphone in the other, waiting for the signal.
“He is pretty cute. You can’t deny that.” Yujin scrolls through Sunghoon’s Instagram feed, multiple gym pics and rehearsal photos lining the grid of his main profile.
When Momo produced Jay’s offer to her, she marketed it to you as the perfect way for PrismHeart to skyrocket from simmering stardom into true mega-fame. All it took was a handful of white lies and scheduled meetups. No harm, no foul, right?
Like a devoted group leader, hands in your lap and a demure smile on your face, you said yes. You would do anything for your team and the girls who were your second family at this point. Not disclosing the truth was an easy thing to do, and nobody’s feelings would be sacrificed in the process.
It would also be a welcome distraction from the destruction of your last relationship. The back and forth with Jake proved to be too much on both your work and personal lives, 7 months of happiness leading to a slow and bitter end.
Maybe a cute boy with no attachments and some light flirting could be a nice way to bounce back into the game. Then, when a real relationship would be possible for you again, you’d be ready.
You nod and take another sip of your drink, the alcohol leaving a burning aftertaste in your throat. “He is,” you agree. “He’s terrible at time management, though, clearly.”
Yujin rolls her eyes and continues scrolling. “Take off your micromanaging hat tonight, babe. Have fun. Kiss your new fake beau.”
“Say it louder,” you chide, lips on the rim of your glass again. The drink was taking the edge off of your nerves, but you still couldn’t shake the desire to make sure things went perfectly.
For both work and personal reasons, you need this to go off without a hitch.
A second later, your phone buzzes on the top of the bar. Sunghoon’s face lights up your screen, along with his message.
[Received at 10:46 PM]: Walking in with Jungwon. U?
You internally roll your eyes at the cryptic text. Jake was so good at making his messages personable, and although you could put a dagger in him for breaking your heart, the least you can do is recognize that was one of his better qualities.
You just hope Sunghoon is better in person than he is on the page. Or phone, so to speak.
[Sent at 10:48]: By the bar with Yujin.
Sunghoon saunters through the club’s double doors, the notorious half of Into Eden smiling ear to ear with his friend Jungwon in tow. Your ex Jake and Jungwon hung in similar circles due to their statuses as popular actors, but Jungwon was always nice when you ran into him.
He greets you with a smile but stops short when he sees your best friend, his cheeks turning a red hue. “Sorry, you’re just even more beautiful in person.”
As Yujin stutters over her next words, sharing a similar blush with the man in front of her, Sunghoon saunters over to your side and grins. As you look closer at him, you can discern the pink around his irises and the flimsy edges of his smile.
He’s high. So much rides on his cooperation on this plan and he’s fucking high?
“Park Sunghoon, pleased to meet you.” He gives your hand a sloppy kiss when your fingers link together in a handshake, and you retract immediately. Sunghoon pays no mind to your distaste, immediately ordering a beer and downing it the second it slides across the bar.
“Do you think you should be mixing alcohol with…whatever’s in your system?”
“Nothing I can’t handle.” Sunghoon winks at you and scoots closer on his barstool to you, tracing the skin of your thighs with his eyes. “I think this is the part where we dance?”
You scoff and down what’s left of your martini. You flag the bartender down for another, incredulous but trying to mask your anger with another drink. “Maybe we should get to know each other first?”
“What’s there to know? Jay gave me all the cliffnotes this morning. And we can just learn as we go, you know?”
A part of you wants to run into this without a roadmap, but it’s not in your nature. And it would be a lot easier to let yourself relax if you knew you were walking into this plan with a person as serious as you are about it.
But no, you get a stoned rockstar as your new “boyfriend” instead.
The bartender hands you your second martini, and you hop off the barstool with it in your hand. You take a light sip before you motion to the dance floor. “Let’s go.”
You have a tight grasp on the stem of your glass as Sunghoon takes your free hand to walk towards the dance floor. You notice Yujin and Jungwon dancing in a far corner together, the two of them hitting it off incredibly well.
Your hips sway to the song, your body trying to follow the music that’s thumping loudly through the speakers. It’s a remix you don’t recognize, but you enjoy it nonetheless. You smile as the pulse of the song thrums through your veins, your nerves at their lowest since arriving at the club.
What you don’t expect is for Sunghoon’s hands to settle on your hips, pulling you closer to fall into rhythm together. He moves well considering his prowess lies in rock rather than pop.
“You’re a pretty good dancer for a bassist,” you tease.
“I have a lot of talents,” he remarks back, the club lights gleaming across his face in purple and pink strobes.
He looks better in person than in all the interviews and tabloids you read prior to meeting him tonight. In your efforts to gain intel for the meetup, you couldn’t deny how well he cleaned up, even when he acted poorly.
The slosh of your drink makes you stop dancing for a second, and you laugh. “Probably shouldn’t have brought this on the–”
Sunghoon captures your lips in a searing kiss. The taste of ale lingers on your tongue the longer both of your mouths are linked. He is a good kisser, no doubt, but where does he get off assuming you wanted him to? All you had to show for tonight so far was some small conversation. Is that his typical green light to dive straight into making out?
You immediately push him off, the contents of your martini glass spilling on him in the process. “What the hell?” Sunghoon asks, touching his jacket and feeling the leather soaked in sugary liquor.
You’re stunned at how brash yet nonchalant he is about what he just did, caring more for his clothes than your personal space that he just invaded.
“You’re such a bastard,” you whisper loud enough for only Sunghoon to hear, his eyes immediately widening at your words. You walk away from him stunned and drop the glass on the counter where you were initially sitting. Not wanting to take Yujin away from her success of a night, you run outside to a handful of cameras flashing and your failure coating your skin.
Late into the next morning, you sip a hefty cup of tea for breakfast as you scroll through your latest mentions. The socials are blowing up from your recent outing with Yujin, Jungwon, and Sunghoon. You half expected to wake up to the ending of your career, but to your relief, the event was nothing short of a success.
Despite your embarrassment on the drive home and sadness before bed last night, your followers and many of Into Eden’s fans seem to have taken the bait. Some took shots of you exiting the nightclub, Sunghoon following shortly behind with a smile on his face. They also edited short clips of the two of you on the dance floor. Incredibly, none of them caught your mishap with your martini on video.
Better yet, they found the prospect of you and Sunghoon not just exciting but fitting somehow.
@edenenthusiast: hope she can whip him back into shape, miss the old hoon.
@sunghoonsluv71: sad he’s off the market but they’re actually cute together???
@prismshearts_09: she looks so happy!! suck it @jaeyun_sim.
In the next second, your phone blows up from a mention on Sunghoon’s most recent story. Your handle is hidden in a far corner of the black screen but the words plastered across the screen say everything they need to.
“Love at first spill? 🍸😏”
All of your band members and Momo light up your group chat with their excitement. In the chaos of the chat, you thumb-up a text from Yujin about Jungwon giving her his number.
Then, a single text pops up from Sunghoon that makes your glee transform into anxiety.
[Received at 11:52 AM]: Lunch on me? :/
You feel a part of your chest flutter. There’s a hope that maybe in the light of day you’ll get a chance to see the real Sunghoon. No drugs, no cameras, no need to impress. Maybe if he’s away from the attention, he’ll realize you deserve an apology for his actions.
[Sent at 11:56 AM]: Lunch and dinner or get lost.
You see the quick succession of bubbles following your text, his response hot on the heels of your last message that he reacts to with a laughing emoji.
[Received at 11:58] I think I can handle that.
You sit across from Sunghoon on the balcony of his apartment, two BLTs cooked to perfection on the patio table in front of you. He kept to his word, laying a spread of food out for you in exchange for your time.
You quirk an eyebrow. “Did you make these yourself?” You ask.
Sunghoon shakes his head, bashful. “Jay helped me. Not only is he a great manager, but he’s actually an amazing cook.”
You nod and smile, grabbing a bite as Sunghoon’s blush and your quiet chewing fills the silence.
“I wanted to say that yesterday got out of hand, and I shouldn’t have gotten wasted before meeting you. It was unprofessional, and I apologize.”
You tap your fingers on the wicker table, your gut warning you to be cautious. “Did Jay tell you to say that?”
Sunghoon stutters on whatever words he planned to say next and quickly runs a hand through his hair. “I mean it, what difference does it make? I really am sorry, okay?”
You roll your eyes. “So you’re apologizing using someone else’s script? That’s supposed to make me believe you?”
Sunghoon scoffs and presses his palms to the table. “You’re fucking impossible, you know that?”
“I’m impossible because you got loaded and decided to stick your tongue down my throat? Oh, and I bet the next words out of your mouth were going to be how stubborn I am because I expected you to actually want to make up for how shit you acted last night.”
“Wow. Are you just mad because you didn’t expect to like me kissing you that much?” Sunghoon says his question with a pestering but sultry tone, the words completely rhetorical.
You huff and make your exit from the table. “Fuck this, I should never have come.”
Before you can walk away from the balcony, Sunghoon takes your wrist in his hand. His eyes express his frustration, his mouth in a grim line. “Don't leave, please. Can we just pretend that the last twelve hours never happened? Start from scratch. We both know we need each other here.”
You take a deep breath and cross your arms, walking back to your side of the table with a stone expression. “I think it’s a good idea to create some rules for…this arrangement.”
Sunghoon stares you down, still irritated but agreeable. “I’m all ears.”
“First and foremost,” you start, “whenever we’re scheduled to meet, no drugs. Do it in your spare time.”
Sunghoon nods. “That’s fair.”
“Second, no PDA unless there’s people around that need to notice it. And we have to agree on it before either one of us initiates anything.”
“What,” Sunghoon laughs, “like a secret bat signal?”
“Sure Batman,” you jest. Does he have to joke every time he decides to speak? Against your better judgment, a small piece of you finds it endearing.
He ponders the thought and then taps two fingers to the side of his neck. “How’s that?”
“Fine,” you agree. “Do you have any other rules you think we should add?”
The word “we” slips so easily from your tongue. In spite of the way he stirs up every ounce of frustration inside of you, already you see him on the same team as you. That has to be a good sign.
He rubs his index finger and thumb under his chin, half teasing but half reflecting on what he could add.
“Only one more thing,” Sunghoon says. “When we don’t have plans to spend time together, what we do in our private time is our business.”
You raise your hands. “Not a problem for me.”
Sunghoon reaches his hand across the table. “Deal?”
What the outcome of your arrangement will be besides the expected results remains up in the air. Whether it will reap what you want is really anyone’s guess. But if it means you do your duties as a good bandmate, you will take whatever comes at you.
You grasp his fingers in yours, shaking them gingerly. “Deal.”
Into Eden’s most popular song “Salvation” plays on the stereo speakers in the photography studio of Vogue magazine’s headquarters. The two men on set act incredibly comfortable, Heeseung’s arm wrapped around Sunghoon’s shoulder. The older musician’s red hair is stark against the chosen clothing for the shoot, but he makes it work.
He always does, Sunghoon thinks with a repressed sigh. His hair is slicked back in contrast to Heeseung’s messy mop of wind-blown tresses, creating the contrast between the two that highlights the shoot’s concept. TWO SOULS COLLIDE: THE LEADING MUSICIANS OF NEW AGE ROCK.
Sunghoon stays still for the next shot of him and Heeseung, but he can’t help himself from following you with his eyes when you enter the studio with a bag of breakfast treats and a to-go tray of coffees.
He did not expect to see you show up to his photoshoot, and Jay didn’t give him any warning for the event on his schedule being one you would share space with. He’s not against it though. In the sea of gray suits and media lackeys, you’re a breath of fresh air. You have already taken his attention away from the mundane nature of the task he’s assigned to complete today.
He can’t deny that Jay’s plan has already made shifts to his image in the public eye. It’s only been a week of public paparazzi candids and social media mentions shared between his and your accounts, and fans are eating it up.
And, though he might never say it out loud, something about your presence levels him in a way Jay’s and Heeseung’s doesn’t. He quantifies it to you also understanding the pressures of the music industry, the feeling of someone outside of his circle who can relate to him foreign but welcome. Your relationship may be manufactured, but he has to look at the positives it’s already created in his life.
Jay runs over to you with a bright smile. “You’re an angel, thank you.”
You grin and take a breakfast sandwich from the bag to give to Sunghoon’s manager. “Least I could do for a member of my boyfriend’s camp.”
Jay winks over the rim of his coffee cup and goes back to the photographer’s side, overseeing the shots with a bit of sausage sticking out of his mouth.
You give Sunghoon a slight wave and stay a few steps away from the large lights capturing the shadows and highlights on the men’s faces.
You haven’t met Heeseung up to this point, so interacting with Sunghoon’s bandmate will add a new dimension to your “relationship.”
In contrast with Sunghoon, Heeseung exudes seriousness in every movement. You’re unsure if it’s because of his maturity or dedication to everything he does, similar to yourself, but it shows in the way the men stand next to each other. Where Sunghoon is fluid like water, transforming into whatever he needs to be, Heeseung is stoic and certain of himself, solid like a stone.
You wonder how such different people managed to be friends and bandmates. Then again, you’re in a group with four other girls, and your personalities are anything but similar.
“Alright, I think it’s time for individual shots. Mr. Park, we’ll do yours first!”
Heeseung runs to his chair in front of the vanity. It’s set up in a corner of the room for retouching his and Sunghoon’s hair and makeup. He beckons you over with a polite smile, and you oblige the silent request.
“Sorry I haven’t been able to greet you since you came in. You know how it is,” Heeseung’s lips turn up at the corners as his makeup artist dabs at his forehead with a clean powder puff. “I’m Lee Heeseung.”
You respond with your name and shake his hand, your nerves spiking. You expected Heeseung to be both attractive and polite, but it’s another level in person compared to his media appearances.
“Have you always been interested in music?” You ask.
Heeseung nods, still smiling. “Since I was old enough to hold a guitar. Both of us, actually. I don’t know if Hoon told you, but he was the one that started the band.”
Your eyes widen in surprise. “No, he didn’t say anything at all. He doesn’t really talk about his work. Neither of us do.”
Heeseung laughs. “Yeah. He’s a closed book a lot of the time. But he’s got a great soul, he just doesn’t let a lot of people see it.”
You look down at your shoes, smiling. “I’d offer you a bagel, but I think the team would kill me if I let you mess up your makeup.”
Heeseung releases another chuckle. “Save it for Hoon, then. Make it a little lunch date.” When the photographer’s assistant calls for Heeseung, he winks at you and leaps off of the chair.
Sunghoon finds you in the next second, smiling warmly before taking the bag of food from your hands. “Please tell me there's an everything bagel in here.”
You nod. “With extra cream cheese.”
He beckons you to the free armchairs on the opposite side of the makeshift vanities. You sit down across from him and find your croissant in the bag, ready to eat it whole at this point.
“You could’ve eaten before I finished. You didn’t have to wait for me.”
You shrug and bite into your food. “Force of habit. I always make sure the girls eat before I do.”
He nods and takes a chunk out of his own bagel. “Like a good leader. I knew Jay liked you for a reason.”
You scoff, practically choking on the egg and cheese in the croissant. “Says the guy who started this whole thing. You didn’t tell me you were the one who made Into Eden.”
Sunghoon shrugs, his mood shifting. “It never came up. Besides, Heeseung took the proverbial role of leader a long time ago, anyway.”
You shake your head, picking at your food. “I bet everyone would give you more of a lead if you proved you could handle the responsibility.”
Sunghoon is taken aback, there’s no doubt about that. When has he not been serious and responsible about his commitment to the band, save for the past year?
Sure, he hasn’t made great decisions recently, especially with his new…habit, simply put. But he’s never stopped caring, no matter how the tabloids turned on him or Heeseung overshadowed him when he began to fall short.
Maybe he needs to put some good will back in, even if he feels justified for being jaded at this point in his career.
Wanting to turn the tide of the conversation, Sunghoon spots a random guitar in the studio and grabs it eagerly. He sits back down with a newfound interest, plucking the strings to ensure it’s in tune.
You laugh and stuff the crumb-filled wrapper in the bag. “Avoiding the subject, I see.”
“Hey,” Sunghoon defends himself. “When I see a guitar, it’s only natural to play it.” He strums a few chords, satisfied. “Have any requests?”
You lift your shoulders, intrigued.
Sunghoon begins playing the opening strings of Oasis’s “Champagne Supernova.” It’s a bittersweet song, one with a beautiful instrumental but somber lyrics. Seems fitting for the man playing it somehow.
He begins to sing the first lines, the fried timbre of his vocals lulling you into a state of relaxation. By the introduction of the first chorus, you’re singing along with him, matching his tone with your saccharine harmonies.
It makes the crowd around you pause to look on for a moment, mesmerized at two stars seeming to shine at the same second. They must resign it to fate, two talents coming together in music and love, unaware of the reality of your situation.
Or maybe, they see the shades of something blossoming that you and Sunghoon have yet to recognize yourselves.
You flip through the newest issue of Vogue, excited to read Sunghoon’s part of the interview. It takes a handful of turns before you make it to the spread, the interview intertwined with shots of Heeseung and Sunghoon clad in V-necks and leather jeans. Their outfits coincide with the grunge aesthetic. You flip through the discussion about their newest album, “Under the Sun,” until one specific segment catches your eye.
VOGUE: So, it’s safe to assume this new album is about dedication, or the commitment, to one’s desires. It shows in your new single off this album, “All For You,” as you said Heeseung, but how do you feel about it Sunghoon?
PSH: I agree with Hee a hundred percent. Sometimes you don’t realize how devoted you are to something or someone until you’re caught in the middle of it. And sometimes that can be beautiful and intoxicating, a reason to go on that keeps you alive in so many ways.
VOGUE: I sense something or someone on your mind besides the album.
PSH: You could say that.
You left hours before the boys began their interview. It could’ve been a million things on his mind when the writer made note of his reaction, but you know the online forums and fandoms must be exploding over the snippet.
“Whatcha reading?” Ningning asks. She walks into your kitchen, looking for a cup to fill with ice water. She may live a few apartments down, but she never fails to use her status as the youngest to barge in whenever she wants.
You show her the front cover when she turns her head back in your direction. “His new article just came out.”
“Any mentions of his new love affair?” She wiggles her eyebrows and you threaten to throw the magazine at her head.
“Drop it already, Ning! It’s not real anyway.”
“Come on. The guy is cute, you’re cute, have some fun with it!”
“I would if he didn’t have so many walls up.”
“Like you don’t?” Ningning tests the waters, the air suddenly thick with tension. “You’re always so serious. You know we love you, but you never let yourself loosen up.”
You sigh and drop the magazine on the counter. “There’s a lot of responsibilities on the line. I can’t just shuck them whenever I want.”
“That doesn’t mean you have to worry every second about them, or about us. Let go sometimes, babe.”
Before you can respond, your doorbell rings. You’re both surprised, not expecting anyone to show up today, but you answer the door anyway.
Sunghoon stands before the threshold with a bag of takeout and a shy smile. His eyes are not bloodshot, his outfit looks purposefully put together, and his posture tells you he’s on a mission. “Figured since you brought food last time, I oughta return the favor.”
Ningning saunters up behind you with a smirk, arms still crossed. “Speak of the devil.”
“Easy, that’s not me,” he jokes. “Probably more of an associate.”
Ningning laughs and takes the cue to exit the apartment. “Have fun, you two, but not too much fun!”
You press your hand to the back of your neck, the heat on your cheeks rising at an alarming rate. “Didn’t know we were supposed to meet today.”
“We weren’t,” he admits.
A corner of your mouth quirks up. “I thought whatever we did in our private time was our business. You’re using the space in your schedule to hang out with me?”
“Don’t flatter yourself.” Sunghoon bops you on the nose with his index finger and drops the bag of takeout on the counter. “I didn’t know what you’d like so I got a little bit of everything. Wontons, crab rangoons, egg rolls…I guess I kinda went overboard, didn’t I?”
You shake your head, the other part of your mouth turning up until your face cracks into a full-blown smile. The uncertainty on his face, the wind-swept hairdo covering a part of his eyes, the rapid motions of his hands taking the containers of food out of the bag.
In any other circumstance, you would consider this an awkward but real first date. And because your heart is not functioning in tandem with your head, you feel the flutters in your stomach all the same. “I’ll eat whatever you brought.”
The sun sets into the clouds surrounding the apartment complexes near yours, the high-rise bathed in orange and yellow hues from the day coming to a close. Your stomach is still overwhelmingly full from the food Sunghoon brought over, but you’re in a comfortable space as you both sit on your couch together watching another episode of New Girl.
“Can I ask you something?”
Sunghoon turns to you, his smile not meeting his eyes. “‘S a free country. But I get to ask you one also. Quid pro quo and all that.”
You ponder how to word your next sentence, not wanting to cross an unspoken boundary. “Why did you start using drugs?”
He sighs, rubbing the palms of his hands on his jeans. “Honestly, I didn’t know the reason until I stopped taking them a few weeks ago…when we started this thing. It helped to take the edge off of things, off of me always worrying about how I was measuring up to Hee. And then they just helped with everything else, until they didn’t.”
Your heart aches at his answer, the explanation one you did not expect to be so in-depth. Like most starlets and singers at your age, it just seemed to be around and available to take whenever you wanted. Not that you or any of the girls in PrismHeart partook, but it was still there.
You didn’t realize that his proclivity started from a place of genuine need for something else. Anything else, if it meant he could escape.
“My turn,” Sunghoon says, turning his full attention to you on the couch. “Why do you never let yourself relax?”
His question and Ningning’s words haunt the deep recesses of your brain in an instant, the unspoken fears inside of you coming to a head as you try to create an answer. “Being able to sing professionally has been something I’ve wanted for as long as I can remember. I guess somewhere deep inside I’m worried if I don’t take it seriously, I’ll lose it forever.”
Sunghoon ruminates on your answer before he traces the outline of your hand with his fingers, the touch setting off sparks on your skin. “We’re more alike than I thought.”
You laugh and throw the pillow under your back at him. “What? It’s not like I’m a robot or something.”
He chuckles and stands up from the couch. “Okay, well, either way, we need to liven the mood again.” Sunghoon scrolls through a playlist on his phone and finds a song that immediately makes his face lighten up. “Perfect.”
He connects his phone to your Bluetooth speakers, the guitar riff of The Darkness’s “I Believe In A Thing Called Love” cutting through the silence from moments before.
“What the hell-“
“Stop thinking for five minutes and dance with me or so help me God.” His eyebrows quirk up in an unspoken challenge, and before you can stop yourself and use your logical brain to think first and then decide, you’re up off of your feet with your best cockney accent to match the lead singer’s tone.
You may be off key and breathless, and Sunghoon may look ridiculous as he riffs on an air-guitar, but it’s the first night in years where you’ve truly felt free. No obligations or restrictions are there to stop you from doing what you please.
That night when you go to sleep, you save the ridiculous song to your Apple Music account and think about Sunghoon’s smile before shutting your eyes.
The flash of cameras is nothing new, especially on a red carpet. What adds a unique dynamic to the situation is Sunghoon standing by. He watches you pose for the cameras, the press doting over you for a shot of your outfit and presence at Into Eden’s album launch party.
His eyes on you burn brighter than the lights strung across the space. You blush to yourself and keep smiling for the multitudes of paparazzi. The next minute, Sunghoon puts a hand on the small of your back gently to lead you in the direction of the club a dozen feet or so away.
“Sunghoon, one picture! Just one!”
You turn your eyes to him and press two fingers to your neck, feigning it off as nervousness in front of the public. Sunghoon smirks and pulls you into his chest, letting the vultures beg for more as he holds you close.
He puts a hand up to say goodbye and walks away with you, palms intertwined. Even as you enter the club, seeing Heeseung and his girlfriend Ryujin waiting for you both, Sunghoon doesn’t let go.
“Do you want a drink?” Sunghoon asks, his thumb rubbing the back of your hand.
“No thank you.”
“Who are you and what have you done to Sunghoon?” Ryujin asks, mystified at his newfound etiquette.
“He’s still around, Ryu. Just trying to be on his best behavior for once.” Sunghoon ruffles her hair before walking away to greet Jay at the bar riddled with executives.
She huffs and fixes the flyaways Sunghoon caused, but smiles at you when she’s done. “Whatever you’re doing to him, keep it up. I haven’t seen him this way in forever.”
Clearly Ryujin’s not aware of the circumstances of yours and Sunghoon’s relationship, but something has changed in him both in and out of the public eye. Many posts and headlines showcased your numerous outings and discreet meetups in the weeks you’ve spent together. However, there were more moments shared between you that the public had no insight on.
Nights in the recording studio, rehearsals for PrismHeart that turned into goofing off between the both of you, and rides on his motorcycle that almost made your head spin.
It’s hard to tell now where the truth stops and the lies begin, and vice versa. How can you tell yourself the smiles that he gives you aren’t genuine? How do you respond to Ryujin without feeling like your answers are coming from the depths of your heart?
“Babe, there’s that director! Let’s go say hi!” Ryujin runs over to the eponymous man with her hand tightly wrapped around Heeseung’s. He smiles apologetically before being stolen away.
You wait for Sunghoon to come back, but not before you witness Yujin and Jungwon linked arm in arm, followed by the last two people you expected to show up tonight.
Jake’s hair is newly dyed, the ash blond of his hair striking under the lights of the club. He doesn’t notice you, only shakes hands with Jungwon and continues on his path to the bar. His date and Sunghoon’s ex Yeji has her body wrapped tightly around his, even as they walk through the crowds of people.
It’s been months since you last saw him, and in spite of your desire to stay and show your pride for Sunghoon and his newest album, you want nothing more than to run out of the club and never come back. Your heartbeat quickens, the thumps of it rattling your chest with no guarantees it’ll calm down.
Like a magnet, Sunghoon is by your side immediately and looking into your eyes with concern. “What’s wrong?”
“Jake’s here. Yeji’s with him.”
Sunghoon scans the crowd and lands on the two at the bar. Jake catches the younger man’s eyes and lifts his drink in congratulations, a smug smirk on his face.
Before he can walk over to the idiot’s spot, you hold onto his arm tightly to stop him. “He’s not worth it, Hoon. Trust me.”
Sunghoon knew enough of your history with the C-list actor from your own admissions and your friend’s anecdotes to want to kick the guy’s teeth in. Jake didn’t just make it harder for you to make your relationship a priority in your life, but he made every issue between the two of you your fault somehow.
And as far as Sunghoon could tell, no-one could be more devoted to the things that mattered to them than you.
“Why the fuck would he show up here?” Sunghoon asks nobody in particular, still fuming at the man’s audacity and his effect on your wellbeing. “The least I can do is show him the door.”
“No, please.” You grip onto the lapels of Sunghoon’s suit jacket, emphasizing your need to have him close. If he leaves you, you might fall apart. “Dance with me?”
Sunghoon’s anger transforms, lightly scoffing at your request with a soft smile to follow. “I don’t think this song is good to dance to, love.”
The term of endearment makes your knees weak, the word on his lips making your fingers tremble against the fabric of his jacket. Yes, the remix of one of Into Eden’s new songs “No Doubt” is more suited for a mosh pit than a couple wanting to dance, but you don’t care. “Dance with me anyway.”
You lead him to the center of the club. Both your worlds look on as you hold him close and try to match the rhythm of the remix. It’s a pointless endeavor, the beat changing right when you think you’ve mastered it. Your attempts to follow make Sunghoon smile. “If it helps, I’m not a big fan of this version of the song. Glad it’s just a B side track.”
You roll your eyes and grin. You rest your head on his chest, deciding to sway softly instead of thinking about the music pumping or the strangers’ passing glances.
“I think we’re breaking rule number two, love,” Sunghoon whispers into the crown of your head.
You move to stare up at him, running two fingers to the side of his neck exposed over the collar of his shirt. “I don’t mind if you don’t.”
In the haze of blinding lights and blank faces, Sunghoon’s is the only one that matters as he bends down and presses your lips to his.
In contrast to the first kiss you ever shared, this one is not entwined with alcohol or unwelcome shock. It’s ingrained with weeks worth of tension and words that you could not read before, the lines between your agreement now crystal clear.
You gladly accept his mouth on yours, your body on fire when his tongue touches the roof of your mouth. His hands slip down to the curve of your hips, squeezing the skin through the confines of your clothes.
The sounds of shuttering cameras and surprised voices intercut with the music are of no priority to you. All that matters is that this kiss never ends. That the feelings you’ve been harboring never have to be concealed again.
Sunghoon walks into Jay’s office with a heavy heart, unsure how to present the situation he will unfold to his manager. He’s been ducking your calls and texts, unsure how to go about his next moves before discussing his predicament with the person he trusts the most in this world, save for Heeseung.
“I could kiss you!” Jay says when he sees Sunghoon walk in, pointing at him with pure glee.
“Please don’t,” Sunghoon responds.
“Streams of ‘All for You’ hit an all-time peak last night, the projected numbers are predicting this record to be your best selling one since the first album, and you’re a golden boy in the press again!” Relief washes over Jay’s face, the success of his plan evident in the easy posture of his body. “Not gonna say I’m a god, but I'm definitely a genius.”
Sunghoon claps his hands together, giving his manager the praise he deserves. “That’s great, Jay. Really.”
“You should be happy, man! We’re on the straight and narrow again. Now I just have to come up with some sweet and easy way to end the whole thing and we’re good to go.”
Sunghoon wants to interject, but Jay continues on with his thoughts, letting them run free out loud. “It should be pretty easy. Just gotta find another event to have you guys attend and then we’ll pull the plug—“
“Jay, I can’t.” Sunghoon blurts out the three words that have been on his mind since he walked into the label’s building. His heart rests in his throat as he holds nothing back. “I like her. Really.”
Jay stops walking around the room and stuffs his hands in his pockets. He blows the hair in front of his face, puzzled. “Well, that’s a pickle.”
“I didn’t mean for it to go this far,” Sunghoon admits, because it’s the truth. He never intended on actually finding you endearing, funny, attractive, all the positive adjectives he can come up with in his mind. “And then the album party happened…and I just can’t.”
Jay sits down at his desk, his face becoming a mask of professionalism. “You know that’s not possible, Sunghoon. I mean, think about it. She has her band, you have yours. It would be a disaster trying to keep it up. The only reason Hee and Ryu are still together is because she isn’t involved in any of this shit.”
Sunghoon shakes his head, vaguely listening to his manager’s words but not giving them weight. “You don’t know her like I do.”
Jay shrugs. “You may be right. But you could barely handle a relationship, real or fake, when this started. Do you think a real one is manageable right now?”
Sunghoon leans back into the armchair, some of his manager’s words hitting too close to home to deny. Would he truly be able to keep a true relationship with you alive when he was always under public pressure and eventual scrutiny?
Sunghoon walks out of the office with more questions than answers, more unsure than he was before.
You sit in your bed, undecided on whether you should try to text Sunghoon again or not. The downpour outside reminds you of the onslaught of emotions pooling in your gut, a mixture of hurt and anxiety weighing heavy on your heart.
He kisses you because you both wanted him to and then he decides to leave you without a single word for days? What kind of sense does that make?
Yujin and Ningning want to cut his heart out with a rusty knife, but you assure them you’re as confused as he probably is, unsure where to go from this point forward.
If only he could give you some signal he’s still alive, you would feel more at ease.
A knock at your door makes you run to answer it, expecting Ningning to show up with Sour Patch Kids and the newest film on your To Be Watched list. “Ning, you better have ‘Bend It Like Beckham’ in your hand or you’re not coming in!”
You open the door to Sunghoon soaked through from the rain. “Sorry I came empty handed.” Sunghoon trails his eyes down your body, smirking at the Hello Kitty pattern of your cotton shirt and shorts. “Nice outfit.”
You shake your head, incredulous that he’s at your door without any word to warn you. “What are you doing here?”
“I had to see you,” he says honestly. He walks through the door and makes you back into the hallway wall. His wet body traps you against him and the walkway. “I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you.”
You give him a lopsided grin. “You have a funny way of showing it.”
He chuckles, swiping his wet hair off his face. “I know, I’m an idiot.”
“And a jerk.”
“And a jerk,” he parrots, eyes full of sincerity. “But I want to be better for you. I want to be worthy of being yours.”
The confession makes your body buckle. The breath that was still in your lungs escapes in one gust from your lips. How can he think he isn’t worth it after all the vulnerability he’s shown you? “You already are, Hoon.”
He places his hands on either side of your face tenderly, his mouth inching closer. “You’re impossible, you know that?”
You mirror his expression, covering his hands with your own. “I might have been told that once or twice.”
His lips collide with yours, the action soft but the emotions charged behind the kiss heavy. Where that kiss in the nightclub was chaste compared to this one, you can only imagine how the rest of the night will play out.
Sunghoon discards his jacket onto the floor, your hands automatically sliding across his damp shoulder blades. Your touch makes him shudder, a moan escaping his throat. “You’re so warm.”
You smirk. “My bed’s warmer.”
The tangle of clothes and tongues leads to your position in his lap on your bed, the comforter discarded somewhere in the rush to get him to sit down and hold you closer.
Your body writhes against his, his pants the only thing left that he’s wearing. He holds you tighter against him, groaning against your lips. “Fuck, are you trying to get me to come already?”
You blush and kiss his neck. “Wasn’t my intention, but I don’t mind.”
Sunghoon chuckles. He flips you onto your back on the mattress, taking your bra off to reveal your breasts. Your nipples perk up once the air hits your skin, and Sunghoon can’t fight the groan that escapes his lips. “You’re fucking beautiful. I could stare at your tits all day.”
Most compliments make you feel like the person giving them is obligated to, not because it’s true. But when you hear such explicit thoughts leave Sunghoon’s mouth, you believe every word he says.
He covers your body with his own, taking one nipple into his mouth as he kneads the neglected breast with one hand. Expertly, he uses his other hand to slide into your underwear, finding your clit in record time.
He swirls his index and middle finger around the bud, using your essence that has already pooled in your panties as lubricant.
You mewl, grasping Sunghoon’s hair in your fingers for purchase on something, anything. “Fuck, that feels good.”
Sunghoon releases your nipple with a pop, his mouth trailing up the valley of your breasts to stop at your lips. “I’m not done yet, darling.”
Suddenly, he has both hands pulling your underwear down your legs, leaving the fabric dangling on the curve of your ankle. He wastes no time settling his face at the apex of your thighs.
He kisses your clit, making your body buck into his face at the quick act. By the time his tongue is inside of you, prodding deliciously at your walls, you’re practically at the brink of an orgasm.
“You like that?” Sunghoon asks, his voice wicked against your pussy, the vibrations of his mouth reverberating against your skin. “Like how I stretch you open, love?”
You nod vigorously. “Yes, Hoon, you know I do.”
He licks a long stripe up your center, from your perineum to the hood of your clit. “I have to be inside you right now, darling. But I promise, I’ll make you come on my tongue later.”
You clench down on nothing, eager to have his body conjoined with yours. He takes his jeans and boxers off in one motion, his cock long and thick. You want nothing more than to take him in your mouth, feel the taste of him on your lips, but you’re too excited for what’s to come when you look in his devilish eyes.
He settles on top of you once again, certain he’s prepped you enough for him to enter you. He looks into your eyes for confirmation, and you kiss his lips to emphasize your eagerness.
He slips inside without issue, his girth stretching you more than his tongue did. Your eyes roll into the back of your head, a curse flying from your mouth when he fills you completely.
“That’s it, baby,” he says, his voice anchored to the skin of your neck. He can practically see the outline of himself on your lower belly protruding through the skin. “Feel all of me.”
His hips push himself in and out of you, his tempo slow and torturous. The rational part of you thinks he’s only doing this for your comfort, but you know him better than most deductions of logic.
Sunghoon knows you want him to go faster from the feeling of your nails digging into his back and your moans in the shell of his ear. But because he loves to tease, he’ll drag this out for as long as he can.
Until he hears you beg for more, that is. And you don’t mind groveling for what you want.
“Hoonie,” you plead, trying hard to meet his hips with your own for more force. “Please fuck me harder.”
Sunghoon kisses your forehead before saying, “Flip over for me, love. All fours.”
You do as he commands. Once you’re in an acceptable position, he slams himself inside of you.
The tempo barely compares to the previous one, giving you no time to do anything but relish in the pistoning of his hips as they make contact with yours. He smacks your ass for good measure, a moan escaping from your lips as he rubs the reddening skin.
“You wanted this,” He reminds you, smacking your other cheek harder as he drills himself in and out of you without any sense of stopping. “Wanted me to ruin you like a good little doll.”
“Yes, yes, please don’t stop,” you beg, stuffing your face into your pillow.
“None of that, my love.” He takes your hair into a makeshift ponytail to raise your head from the bed. “Want everyone to hear how good you feel, how well you’re being fucked. And I want them to know how beautiful you sound when you come.”
You’re limp by the time your orgasm rushes through you, your body wrecked to no end as you’re bathed in ecstasy.
“Holy shit,” you mewl, still feeling the aftershocks.
Sunghoon continues on with his relentless attention, his speed not letting up. He moves you against him and vice versa as he pleases, seeing the white coating of your essence on his cock as it disappears inside of you.
“Fuck, baby, where do you want me to come?” He asks, unsure how much longer he can hold it in.
“Inside of me, please.”
Don’t have to tell him twice.
A groan rips from Sunghoon’s throat as he releases inside of you, knowing his entire load is painting you white. If only he could see it, see how much of him is a part of you now.
He runs his hands up and down your body when you both come down from your highs. He kisses the reddened skin of your backside as he drags a washcloth between your legs, making sure not to overstimulate you in the process of cleaning you up.
You stare at each other, both in lingering rapture as well as disbelief. He hums a song into your ear as your eyelids flutter closed, the gravel in his voice the perfect lullaby.
You wake up the next morning to Sunghoon playing the chorus of “Wonderland,” PrismHeart’s first hit on the Top 100. You grin to yourself, holding the comforter close to your chest. “Trying to record that music video was such a pain.”
Sunghoon turns and smiles at your awoken form, putting the guitar against your side table. He takes you into his arms, kissing the top of your forehead. “How so?”
“They wanted us to do this themed shoot. White rabbits, decks of cards, me dressed as Alice. But every time the director tried filming the segment where we all went down the rabbit hole, it just kept going wrong.” You laugh and run your fingers across Sunghoon’s chest.
He chuckles and kisses your shoulder. “They didn’t think to try a different concept out?”
You shook your head. “We all agreed on it. Besides, the story is actually one of the inspirations for the songs. I read a lot of Lewis Carroll growing up, but I always loved ‘Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland’ the most.”
Sunghoon runs his lips across your neck, his hand tracing circles into your waist. “A beautiful girl lost in her fantasies. Sounds nice,” he whispers, his breath creating delicious waves of heat across your skin.
It still doesn’t feel real, having him so close and naked against you in your bed. It could be a dream, one action of your subconscious playing on your deepest desires. And if that were true, you wish you would never come out of it, too happy for words to express.
When Sunghoon slips under the covers and between your legs once again, you wonder if the faraway place that held your dreams could hold a space for Sunghoon too.
It only takes one weekend for your happiness to come crashing down. Whatever you and Sunghoon were building is destroyed, all in the span of seventy-two hours.
Sunghoon is helping you cook a plethora of pancakes when your front door opens in a slam. Yujin and Jungwon bust through with worried expressions.
“You guys haven’t seen it, have you?” Yujin asks, frown lines etched on the sides of her mouth. She hands you her phone, and you and Sunghoon look over the article headline on the screen.
“‘INTO EDEN’ & ‘HEARTPRISM’ CAUGHT IN DATING SCHEME? IS IT REAL OR JUST FOR SHOW? EXCLUSIVE INSIDER TELLS ALL!”
Sunghoon pulls out his phone to call Jay, stalking into your bedroom. The conversation immediately bursts into a screaming match, the sounds of Sunghoon’s anger apparent.
“I swear to God, Jay, if you don’t find out whoever leaked this shit, I’m gonna have your head on a plate right next to theirs.”
Yujin and Jungwon grow quiet. With the news shared, your friend hugs you and walks out the door with Jungwon in tow.
Sunghoon throws his phone onto your bed and walks back over to you, clearly worn out from the information he told Jay and the facts that were given to him by his manager.
You give him a close-lipped smile and envelop him into a hug. Sunghoon strokes your hair as you promise him, “It can be fixed, Hoon, and it will.”
A few days and one interview later prove that in spite of your hopes, not all things are fixable.
Jay sets up a quick interview with Buzzfeed under the guise of discussing the new album. Everyone knows the sole reason for its existence is to quell the rumors of your false romance. It started that way, yes, but that doesn’t mean you or Sunghoon have to divulge that information to the public.
Heeseung and Sunghoon discuss the inspiration for their songs and the creative process behind the album. And when the questions come up regarding the rumors, Sunghoon plays them off with a smile.
“I’m not desperate enough to need to fake a relationship with anyone! How stupid would I have to be to do that?”
The interviewer quirks an eyebrow. “Are you saying your girlfriend was desperate to date you?”
“All I’m saying is that she pursued me that night in the club, and I was more than happy to see where it would go. And as they say, the rest is history.”
Heeseung looks at Sunghoon with wild eyes, his face practically screaming: That’s the best answer you could come up with?
When Sunghoon comes to your door that night to explain himself and how his words got twisted after the fact, you open the door only to throw the jacket he left in your apartment in his face.
“Desperate,” you seethe. “That’s the word you thought best described me, huh? So I guess I’m also stupid enough to want to date you, too?”
“No, I didn’t say that! I didn’t say any of those things!”
“So the interviewer was lying? Just another person or thing out to get you, right Sunghoon? When will you take responsibility for once and own up to the shit you said about us, about me?”
The girls huddle behind you as the tears stream down your face. “Just leave me alone, Sunghoon. Get away from me, use this as the out you wanted since day one.”
You slam the door in his face, not bothering to address the fist that slams into your door or Sunghoon’s pleas for the two of you to work this out.
His heart shatters from the force of his mess, a mess that not another soul can be blamed for but him.
Weeks roll by into painful silence, not a single exchange shared. You blocked him on all social media in hopes to avoid taglines of your name in relation to Sunghoon, but it’s of no use. The time comes where the girls have to keep your phone away in hopes you’ll stop searching online for comments related to the Buzzfeed article. “Babe, it’s not gonna do you any good,” Yujin sighs, powering off the device.
You nod, resigning yourself to the fact that whatever relationship you had is over, and there was no way to prevent it. You could not control or change Sunghoon anymore than he could change himself, and unfortunately, he was still in the process of doing so and shattered your heart in the quest to be a better man.
Sunghoon, on the other hand, tries everything to repair what he’s destroyed. He pleads with Jay to make contact through Momo, but his hands are tied. “She doesn’t want to talk to you, man. If I keep pestering Momo she’s going to have my ass, and not in a fun way. I’m sorry.”
The first few weeks of the tour comes and goes in a haze, Into Eden beginning their string of tour dates up and down the eastern coast of America. The only time Sunghoon is coherent enough to remember anything is in the mornings before he falls into another night of misery. He doesn’t go back to his usual routine of drugs and booze, keeping his promise religiously. Instead, he goes on in a blur, playing his instrument and performing his parts of the songs without a hitch.
He may not be happy, but at least he’s doing something he‘s always been meant to do.
One afternoon of rehearsals, Sunghoon decides to use his break time on the roof to his advantage. The sounds of the city, its car horns and speeding pedestrians, keep him sane for once in a long time.
Of course, Heeseung has to ruin the solitude with his presence. “Sunwoo said I’d find you up here.”
“Sunwoo needs to learn to shut his mouth and focus on sound mixing,” Sunghoon grumbles, strumming the electric guitar in his lap and avoiding Heeseung’s gaze.
Heeseung sighs and sits next to his best friend. Both of their legs dangle over the edge of the building as they take in the bird’s eye view of New York City. “If you want to fix things, you just have to tell her how you feel.”
“Thanks, Yoda. Where would I be without you?”
Heeseung laughs at the young man’s ridiculous attitude, Sunghoon’s stubbornness unbroken since they became friends. “Just because you may not like my advice doesn’t mean I won’t give it to you.”
“What nuggets of wisdom could Mr. Perfect give me that I haven’t heard a thousand times over?”
“Is that what you think of me?” Heeseung runs a hand over his face, mystified at Sunghoon’s words. “I don’t know where or when you got this notion in your head that my life is perfect, but it’s complete bullshit.”
“Look at you and look at me, Hee. Everyone has said it for years. How much more talented you are, how much better you handle the spotlight compared to me, the list goes on and on.”
Heeseung closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. “Ryujin and I almost broke up last year.”
Sunghoon looks at his best friend, stunned. “Fuck, really?”
His best friend nods. “The last album’s release…I was never home. Ryujin kept getting on my case about us not spending time together, and we took a break for a few weeks. Once I realized how dumb it was for us to be fighting in the first place, things went back to normal. Well, normal and one relationship counselor later.” Heeseung sighs. “Jay kept it quiet from everyone, including you.”
“You could’ve told me,” Sunghoon says, guilty he had no clue.
“I know. But everyone has their secrets, just like you.” Heeseung emits another breath from the depths of his lungs. “I’m glad you know now, though.”
Sunghoon nods. The reality of what he’s done, coupled with the fact he’s spent so long misunderstanding one of the only people to love him so earnestly, hits him hard. Against his will, a few tears escape his eyes. “I really fucked up, Hee.”
Heeseung takes Sunghoon by the shoulder and makes Sunghoon look him in the eyes. “Then fix it. And let me help you.”
Sunghoon smiles, his first real smile in weeks. “How?”
Heeseung smirks. “I may not be as good at making plans as Jay, but I have a few ideas.”
The arena is alive with the sounds of the audience chanting and the instrumental intro to “All for You” exploding from the main stage and stadium speakers. Sunghoon tries to brush off his sudden nerves, the gravity of what he’s about to do shaking him to the core. It could go terribly wrong or do nothing to fix his problems, but he has to try, right?
Heeseung puts his hand on Sunghoon’s back, his bandmate providing the reassurance and stable ground he needs. “You got this, Hoon.”
The two men step on stage, the crowd screaming an octave higher when they take their instruments off their stands. Sunghoon raises a hand, motioning for the band to go quiet and the audience to silence their cheers.
“As you know, a few months ago I met a person that really matters to me. I want her and all of you to know that she still does. And if she’s listening somewhere tonight, she should know that this is for her.”
Sunghoon begins playing the first chords of the song he’s written, nobody but Heeseung and the band aware of this change in the setlist. “This isn’t off of our new album, but I hope you all like it. It’s called ‘Lost in Wonderland.’”
Sunghoon begins the song on his guitar, Heeseung following behind him with backing vocals and a bass. The audience sways to the song, enraptured by the lyrics and melodies of the two musicians. Sunghoon pours his heart into the chorus, hoping by some luck that you’ll be able to hear this if nothing else.
“Maybe I’ll see you in Brooklyn, maybe I’ll see you in France. As long as the waves keep on rolling in. Things don’t always go the way they’re planned.
“Maybe I’ll see you in Jersey, maybe next year in Japan. Sometimes it’s so hard to find a friend, you’re the only one that just might understand.
“Lost in wonderland…”
By the time the final chorus rings out, the notes of Sunghoon’s guitar flying through the air gracefully, Sunghoon feels a million times lighter. All he can hope for now is that his plea will reach you amidst the sea of screaming fans.
Sunghoon runs off the stage as soon as the band finishes playing their last song, unable to hold his composure any longer. What stops him short from running to the green room is your face riddled with tears.
Sunghoon is unsure what to do next. Hold you in his arms and not let go, the last time he saw you being too long for him to accept as reality? Or confess what he said on stage was only a fragment of what he holds in his heart?
You beat him to the punch, your words coming out practically on top of each other. “Momo booked me a red eye to get here in time. She said Heeseung told her something had happened to you before the concert and—“
“I love you,” Sunghoon interrupts, the three words and eight letters no longer able to be kept inside of him.
You smile, eyes puffy but shining. Before you can ask him if what he just said is true, he repeats it until the words go stale, but they don’t. “I love you,” he says, “and I’m so sorry I made you think I didn’t.”
He runs to you immediately and kisses you with all the energy he has left in his body. The feeling of your mouth on his and your hands gripping tight onto his shirt fixes the part of him that broke the second you told him to get lost.
He knows he’ll never let you go again, never take you for granted for another second, and always remind you how much of you is home to him now.
When you part, you ask him, “Did you really write that song for me?”
Sunghoon smirks. “Every single line.”
You nod, running your thumb across his chin. “I love you, too.”
The resounding sound of the bustling audience leaving the venue and the crew packing up fills the background as you kiss Sunghoon again, making up for the time you lost, and preparing for all the times to come.
1 YEAR LATER
PrismHeart’s new album cover is plastered across the press wall. The red carpet is dyed neon pink to accentuate the colors of the title, “Love Language.” It’s a fitting name for the project in your opinion, many of the songs directly inspired by your personal life.
Yujin fusses with Jungwon’s suit once they’re away from the press wall, their matching ensembles making you smile. They’ve been together for as long as you and Sunghoon have at this point. Sharing your songs and thoughts for the newest record has been easy thanks to a fellow member being stupidly in love like you.
Sunghoon steps onto the carpet for his round of paparazzi photos. His suit and jewelry are completely black except for the shirt he picked out that coordinates with your dress. It may be too pink for his taste, but he’d do anything to make you happy, and he knows how to stay on theme for a special occasion.
You add on a few brownie points in your mind for how incredible he looks, the suit emphasizing the contours of his body that you know too well by now.
When Sunghoon’s done with his pap walk, he has to hold himself back from running to you and kissing you hard on the mouth. His composure hangs by a thread through seeing the top of your chest accentuated by the sweetheart neckline of your bubblegum pink dress.
He holds you close and kisses you on the cheek, a halfway point between what he should do and what he wants to do to you, the audience around them be damned.
The audience in question goes crazy when his lips linger on your cheek, the candid shot perfect for the slew of tabloids that will come out tomorrow.
“You look fucking incredible, just so you know,” Sunghoon whispers in your ear.
You smack him on the chest softly, beaming. “Language, Hoon!”
“Hey, forgive me. Words of affirmation and all, y’know. My love language.” He winks, and you chuckle into his chest.
“You and your dad jokes. You’re lucky I love you.”
“I am,” he confesses, taking a free lock of hair between his fingers. “Very lucky.”
Before you can tell him you feel the same, you hear the sound of your name on an interviewer’s lips. You walk hand in hand with Sunghoon to greet her before she begins her parade of commentary, both of you all smiles as you discuss your latest single.
The show must go on, the multitude of cameras and questions second nature by now. But with Sunghoon’s hand in yours and your heart completely his, you know that none of the fame will compare to the happiness that his love has brought to your life.
@yvnempire @sjylouvre @mini-mews @jayparked @heesuncore @yoursjaeyun @sungbeams @jenoslutie @loserlvrss @pars-ley @lovetaroandtaemin @wonwovy @monamipencil
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violet "vi" x female reader — 𝐯𝐚𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐞'𝐬⠀𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭
summary: on valentine's day, and you've finally worked up the courage to write a letter to your crush confessing your feelings. unfortunately, your friend accidentally gives the letter to the one person you can't stand. warnings/themes: fluff, one sided enemies, valentines, kissing cam, angry confessions, fast burn ig, high school, mordern au words: 10.9k
You look at the letter in your desk, which you spent at least six hours working on to make sure it's perfect. Not just to make sure the words you're choosing are perfect, though—you want to make sure your handwriting is perfect enough that it doesn't look sloppy.
You grab the letter and read it over one last time… lovey-dovey bullshit, sappy stuff, romantic nonsense, etc.
You cringe at the last words, “Meet me at the bleachers... break time.”
It's so cliché, so stereotypical, and maybe you've had a couple too many cheesy romance movies in the past month. You've probably read a dozen fanfics that start like this.
If it were done by anyone other than yourself, you'd think it was absolutely dumb and corny as hell.
You know you could just message them through snapchat or on insta, or facebook, even just confessing through their email is a good idea… but, no, you just can't do that.
What if you say the wrong thing? what if you just happen to say something extremely cringy in your message? what if they screenshot it and put it on their story for everyone to see? what if they reply with “who is this...?” what if they start ignoring you?
Plus, you love your phone too damn much, and you know you're gonna end up throwing the damn thing because of the absolute panic you're gonna feel when your finger hits that send button.
You probably should have just sent a carrier pigeon or something… at least they could eat that.
Oh wait.
You forgot one thing.
You look around your room, trying to figure out what you left out. Your penmanship is on point, the words are as romantic as they could be, and the grammar is perfect... but what's missing?
The perfume.
The bottle of perfume is on your dresser, hiding behind the jewelry case. You spray it liberally, making sure the paper absorbs the smell of it, before finally folding it up neatly and placing it in the envelope. You seal the envelope with a kiss to the paper and hope it's the ‘special touch’ that it needs.
The smell is nice, just enough to have the paper absorbing it nicely, but not enough to be overwhelming (even if you love the perfume to death). You also want your recipient to be able to read the letter without cringing.
Okay, now it's really done. It's romantic, it smells good, and it's as perfect as you can get it.
Tomorrow's the day, and you finally feel confident. You have everything ready to go, you just have to figure out how to get your friend to deliver it to your crush's locker.
As you get ready for bed, the only thing you can't stop thinking about is how tomorrow will go.
Will they love the letter? will they finally realize the feelings you have for them and confess their own feelings? who knows?
—
“Come on,” you whine, begging Ekko for the fifth time. “Just do me this favor, please?”
Ekko just scoffs and gestures to the table. “I already told you, I have all of these-” he motions to the dozens of letters in front of him, “-that i'm supposed to deliver for girls that are crushing on Caitlyn.” He sighs. “I can't add any more to my to do list.”
“Please?” you beg, waving the envelope at him. “It's really important.”
Ekko groans and slumps forward, resting his chin on the palm of his hand. “Why can't you just deliver it yourself?”
“It's kinda.. embarrassing… for me to deliver it myself…” You fidget awkwardly.
“Ugh.” Ekko groans again but gives in. “Fine,” he relents, sitting up straight and grabbing the letter from you.
“Thank you.”
“Yeah, yeah.” Ekko waves his hand dismissively. He stands up and stretches out, letting out a deep sigh as he does. “Just remind me what locker number it is?” he asks, shoving the letters into his bag.
“Locker number is 13 C,” you reply, watching as Ekko slings his bag over his shoulder and starts walking out of the cafeteria. “It's pretty much right next to Caitlyn's, so you won't be missing it.”
“Got it,” he says, turning around and flashing a grin at you. “See ya later.” He gives you a salute before he disappears.
Finally.
After months of keeping your feelings quiet, your secret would be revealed. You just have to hope that it doesn't blow up in your face.
—
Ekko walks down the hallway, scanning through the numbers above the lockers until he finds the one he's looking for.
Caitlyn's locker.
He scans the area for any sign of Caitlyn, and luckily for him, the coast is clear.
He pulls out the envelopes from his bag, each one slightly crinkled from being stuffed in there. He counts up the total- ten, no, twelve... wait. Fifteen? that's more than he thought, he could have sworn there were less. He dumps all the letters on top of the locker hole.
He looks down at the remaining letter in his hand. Right, that one isn't for her. He sighs and places the letter next to her locker, just like he was told to do.
He gives the locker one last look but doesn't give it a second thought and starts walking away, whistling as he goes.
But... what Ekko didn't know is that instead of placing it into the locker next to it, he accidentally dumped it into 11C, aka, Vi's locker.
—
You wait at the entrance of your school, impatiently bouncing on your feet. Valentine's day is tomorrow, and you can't wait for your crush to read the letter you poured your heart into.
Then, you spot Ekko, and you're quick to greet him. “Hey!” You throw an arm around his shoulders. “So, did you put it in?”
He nods, gesturing to the school doors. “Yeah, I did.”
You sigh, relieved that the letter is in your crush's locker and will likely be seen by them soon. “Thanks.” You give him a squeeze on the shoulder before letting go of him. “I seriously owe you one for this.”
Ekko just brushes you off. “It's nothing.” He shrugs and shoves his hands in his pockets as you start walking into the courtyard. “Just doing my good deed of the day.”
“Mhm, hopefully tomorrow goes as planned,” you say, “I just hope they like it…”
—
Tomorrow finally comes, and it's the day you've been patiently waiting for. Valentine's day.
You're in your first class, waiting for your teacher to come in. You're distracted, your mind racing with thoughts about what your crush thinks of the letter.
Then, someone suddenly sits next to you, and you turn to look at-
“What the hell?” you blurt out, looking at Vi as she makes herself comfortable in the chair.
Vi smirks. “Hey,” she greets.
That smirk alone pisses you off.
You still haven't gotten over the fact that because of her, your grades had taken a nosedive. The two of you had been paired together in science class, and she'd somehow managed to blow up the experiment, all because she wasn't paying attention.
“What the hell are you doing here?” you snap, glaring at her.
She simply glances at you, then back at the desk she's sitting on. “What do you think? I'm sitting.”
The audacity?
“I know that, but why are you sitting next to me?”
“Come on, don't act like you don't know.” She throws in a wink, and your disgust quickly multiplies.
“Excuse me?” you sputter, completely caught off guard by her sudden flirtatious behavior.
“You really gonna act like you don't know?"
“No?”
She scoffs and leans towards you, smirk on her lips. “I mean,” she adds, eyeing you up and down, “I thought you'd be... happy... to see me.”
You're stunned, confused, and quite frankly, grossed out. “Happy to—WHY ON EARTH would I be happy to see you?” you spit out.
She huffs and slumps back into the chair. “Oh wow, thanks for the warm welcome.”
“Well, what did you expect? You haven't exactly been... pleasant to be around.”
She narrows her eyes and opens her mouth to reply but stops short as the teacher enters the classroom.
She finally shuts up, and you're left wondering what just happened. Why in the world is someone who is a pain in your butt cheeks suddenly flirting with you? is there something wrong with her? or has she lost her damn mind?
—
It's recess, and you're sitting on the bleachers, waiting for your crush to show up.
Your palms are sweating, you're starting to worry that your armpits are going to start smelling, you're probably going to end up throwing up on someone's shoes.
The letter was probably too much. The words were too romantic. The whole cliché “meet me at the bleachers” thing was just cringe. Who wrote that? oh right... you did.
But even if the outcome isn't what you hope for, at least you've got a good story to tell later or maybe a good reason to drown yourself in ice cream and cheesy rom-com movies.
You look around the bleachers once, twice, three times. You try to avoid glancing at your phone, but the urge to check the time only grows stronger.
It doesn't help that a couple of assholes are sitting a few feet away from you, loudly laughing at some video playing on one of their phones.
Recess is almost over, and your crush is still not here. Where the hell are they?
Maybe they could possibly be in the bathroom, having a nervous breakdown like you were? or maybe they're just taking their sweet time, making sure they're looking perfect?
Or maybe they're not coming at all.
And then you hear footsteps coming your way,
THIS IS IT.
Is your hair okay? yes. Are your teeth brushed? yes, dumbass.
You quickly wipe your sweaty palms, trying to calm your racing heart. You turn around, ready to see the face of an angel, the face of a goddamn god-
But instead you see the face of someone you'd rather shove into a brick wall.
Vi.
Why the hell is she... smiling at you?
“Damn, you look good from this angle.”
WHAT?
Why is this goddamn lesbian here with that stupid smile on her face?
“Why are you here?”
“Isn't it obvious? I'm here to see you.” She pulls out an oddly familiar envelope from her pocket and holds it in her hand, and you realize why it's so familiar.
Wait... that's your letter!
The one you wrote to your crush. The one that's meant to be in their locker, not in her damn hands.
How the hell did it end up with her?
She looks at the envelope, studying the handwriting on it, and then her eyes lock with yours again. “This is yours, right?”
Your hand quickly snatches the envelope from her hand. “How the fuck did you get that?”
Vi quickly snatches the envelope away, holding it out of your reach. “Whoa, woah, wait-”
“Give me that!” You lunge for the envelope, but she sidesteps you.
Vi laughs, holding the envelope away from you. “Isn't this for me?” She opens the envelope and throws it aside, then pulls out the letter and starts reading it aloud. “Dear... what the hell, how do you... whatever. Dear blah, blah, blah, happy valentine's da-”
“-SHUT UP!” You try to snatch the letter again.
“Hey, I'm not done reading it yet! This is my valentine's gift, after all.”
“That letter is meant for someone else!”
“Really? Then why did I find it in my locker?”
“Wait, what? You found it in—you're joking, right?”
She shakes her head, waving the letter in front of you. “Nope, I'm not joking.”
“How did you-”
“Someone put it in my locker.”
“That's impossible! I would never—I mean to you? there's no way that was meant for you.”
Vi squints at the words in the letter, then looks up at you again. “But this is definitely written in your handwriting, right?”
How did it end up in her locker? and how the hell does she even know what your handwriting looks like?
Your eyes dart from the letter in her hands to her face. Yes, it's definitely your handwriting. Yes, it's definitely the same stupid letter you wrote because you're a hopeless romantic.
“Maybe,” you grumble.
“Maybe? so it is yours?”
You avoid her gaze, avoiding her smug look.
She starts reading over the letter again, reading it aloud. “Meet me at the bleachers, how goddamn cliché-”
“STOP READING IT!”
“Damn, I didn't think you could be this corny.”
“Shut up, just-” You try to snatch the letter out of her hand once again, but she pulls her arm away.
“You wrote this much for someone?”
“Why do you care so damn much, anyway? You didn't get a valentine gift or something?” and now you're just being bitchy as well.
“What are you, ten?” she retorts.
“And what are you, an idiot?”
“I'm not an idiot, unlike you.”
“Oh, wow, are we back in sixth grade now?”
She looks down at the letter. “I'm not the one who wrote a heartfelt letter for someone who probably doesn't even like you.”
“And how the hell would you know?”
“Have you even talked to them before?” She lifts her head, her smirk coming back when you didn't answer. “Since whoever the hell you have a crush on doesn't like you-”
“They could still-”
“See, everyone has a valentine. Well, almost everyone, which means your crush probably got one too.”
“Yeah, 'cause you got that letter they were supposed to receive.”
“Maybe I was meant to have it then.”
“You're seriously that sure that the universe wants you to have this?”
“Maybe it's a sign.”
You pinch the bridge of your nose. “Are you just dumb on purpose?”
She grins. “I'm not doing it on purpose, and maybe it's a sign that I should be your valentine, that the universe is trying to tell you something.”
You roll your eyes. “Wow, so confident. If I didn't know any better, I'd think you're actually serious.”
“And what if I am serious?” You look at her blankly as she shrugs. She actually thinks she's funny. “I mean, you don't have a valentine, which does kind of suck, and I don't have one, which is by choice, by the way, so I think the universe is clearly telling us something.”
What the actual hell is wrong with her today? she didn't get enough sleep or something, and now she's acting like... like this? this is weird.
She's being weird.
“What, is the universe now trying to set us up? really? we're gonna get a movie based off this?”
“Hey, no one said this was a movie, maybe it's just a cute little high school romance,” she argues back. “Plus, you put a lot of work into this letter, and I'd hate for it to go to waste.”
“I'm not in the mood to start a cute little high school romance with you, okay?”
She heaves a dramatic sigh. “Look,” she says, holding up a hand to stop you from replying, “it's valentine's day, right? and we both don't have anyone, so it's just... for today, we can, you know... see what happens, and if it doesn't work out, then we can just leave it alone and go back the way we were.”
You blink slowly. “That sounds worse than your whole ‘the universe wants us together’ bullshit.”
“Wow, don't act like the idea of it is so awful. I mean, I'm not that bad, right?”
You're going to disagree with that with every single cell in your body, but you decide not to, instead, you just remain silent.
Vi seems to take your silence as agreement because she gives you this insufferable smirk like she just won something.
She continues. “It makes sense if you think about it. We're both single, you're already in a lovesick mood because of this,” she gestures at the letter, “so if we do, you know... we can get it out of your system, and you won't have to spend the rest of the school year pining over some person who is probably ignoring you anyway.”
Why is she making some sense? no, why is she sounding like... a good option all of a sudden?
“It's just for today,” she reminds you again. “We'll just see where it goes. Who knows, you might actually have some fun with me.”
This feels like you're cheating on your crush for even entertaining this stupid plan.
“You're basically saying that we're going to spend one day together and then you'll ditch me?” you retort.
“No, that's not what I'm saying,” she corrects you. “I'm saying we're gonna spend one day together, and if it doesn't work out, then we go our separate ways. It's just one day, it can't hurt. It won't be such a big deal.”
“I'm not going to be your one day entertainment.”
“Who said you'd be my entertainment?” She rolls her eyes, shaking her head at you. “You and I both know you have no other options. What're you gonna do instead, go home and cry over this person who doesn't even know you exist, or just spend the day wallowing in self pity while the rest of the school is celebrating love and stuff with their actual valentines?”
You wince at her harsh words because... she's got a point.
You don't have anyone to spend this day with, and the person you'd want to spend it with will probably spend it with someone else... so yeah, you have no plans, and yeah, you're probably going to just go home and wallow in self pity, wishing that today was over already.
What would happen, actually? if you go along with her stupid plan. You could finally have an escape from pining over your stupid crush who probably doesn't even notice you.
“Fine.” You snatch the letter back from her.
“Wait, what? really?” She's actually surprised. No wonder, she's the one who came up with this stupid plan in the first place.
“I am,” you say, “you don't want me to?”
She huffs out a laugh. “No, no, of course not. I just… didn't expect you to actually agree.”
“And why is that?”
“I don't know, I figured you'd still have a little bit of decency left in you.”
What a backhanded compliment. “I have plenty of decency left in me, it's you who I'd question, and besides... it's just for today.” You fold the letter and shove it into your pocket.
Vi hums, not taking that offense to your comment. “Just today,” she repeats. “Then tomorrow, boom, everything goes back to normal.”
You nod. “Back to normal.”
“I could kiss you right now.”
Whoa woah woah. Calm down. “Ew, what?”
“I didn't say I will kiss you,” she points out, “I said I could.”
You could say something mean to her words, you could try to change the subject or you could just walk away and forget this conversation ever happened.
But what you actually say is, “What's stopping you then?”
You hate how that sounds so casual. It wasn't meant to come out like that. What the hell?
You're not entirely sure, but something is definitely encouraging you to keep this going. Is it because you find everything she does annoying or that you've been pent-up over your stupid crush lately and you need to get it out of your system?
Vi raises an eyebrow at your words. “You want me to kiss you?” The words drip out of her mouth, like honey on a spoon.
“No,” you reply on instinct, because of course not.
But you can't stop the way your eyes flicker down to look at her lips. You look back at her face, and you know damn well she saw you look down at her lips, but she doesn't say anything about it.
“So now that it's official... you're my valentine, and today, we're going to have the shittiest, most awesome date-” she coughs, “-i mean hangout, that you'll ever have.”
“I doubt it.”
“Hey,” she says, “don't underestimate me, okay? I know how to have a good time,” and then she, god help you, she winks at you.
She looks like she's about to say something more, but she stops when the bell rings.
“Meet me at the parking lot after class?” she asks.
You find yourself nodding. “Yeah, sure.” You look at the field for a second and then look back, just so you can catch her reaction—and it's not at all what you were expecting. She's... blushing?
It's subtle, more subtle than you'd think, but her cheeks are definitely red, and when she realizes you notice her, she looks away.
She looks embarrassed.
She's embarrassed?
“Anyway, see you there... valentine.” She doesn't look at you. “Try not to miss me too much.”
What? miss her? She sounds like she's trying to joke about it, but something about the way she says it sounds sincere? What the fuck?
She starts to walk away. You're pretty sure you see another smile on her face, and if you didn't like her so much, you'd probably like how she looks when she does.
But you remind yourself, this is Vi.
The same Vi you've known for years, the same Vi who made your grades worse because of a stupid experiment, the same Vi who you'd probably love to throw out the nearest window if you could, and the same Vi you can't stand.
You force yourself to turn away, and you start to walk back to the school building. You try to push the image of her stupid blushing face and her stupid pretty smile out of your brain because you are not... going to make the mistake of being attracted to her.
—
Time passes by more slowly than a snail.
What's the saying...? ‘A watched pot never boils?’ You're pretty sure you could watch paint dry, and it would move at a faster pace.
Why is time passing so slowly today?
You're not sure if it's because you have this... ‘hangout’ to expect at the end of the day or if it's because you keep getting distracted by the thoughts of what is going to happen later.
What you do know is that you end up spacing out way too much more than a person should.
Thankfully, you don't have any homework, but your notes for the day are just absolutely horrible, a mindless mess of scribbles and pointless words. You're definitely going to regret this later.
The last bell mercifully rings just as you're in the middle of doodling a small sketch of Vi's face in the corner of your notes.
You quickly shut your notebook and stuffed everything into your bag.
You need to find your goddamn common sense first, but it seems to have left the room before you could.
The hallway is a goddamn mess.
Kids are running everywhere in the halls, screaming loud as hell, some girl is trying to stuff her locker to the point where it's going to explode, and some kid has got a goddamn boombox and is blasting music from it. There's the hallway drama that everyone loves listening to even though they should be minding their own business.
Seriously, it feels like you're in the middle of a goddamn jungle with the amount of people screaming.
Walking to the parking lot takes longer than it usually would. When you get there, you see a familiar head of pink hair leaning against a red motor, scrolling through something on her phone.
She hasn't noticed you yet, and you find yourself unable to move your feet for a second.
She's just leaning back against the motorcycle, lazily swiping through something on her phone. She's even biting her lower lip slightly, and for some reason, you really don't know why that's such a good look on her.
Okay, what?
You need to stop letting your brain run away with these thoughts.
You are not going to act like a middle school idiot who just got caught looking at her crush or something. You're an intelligent, mature human being. You're definitely not some dumb kid with an embarrassing crush either. Definitely not.
The sunlight makes her glow, and when she looks up from her phone, you feel you're hit with a wave of goddamn sun poisoning because the sunlight hitting her eyes makes them shine.
She looks over and sees you, shoving her phone into her pocket. She gestures you over with a slight jerk of her head.
You force your feet to start cooperating and get your ass over there.
“Glad you came.”
What kind of response would even be the right one for that? “Me too” would sound too enthusiastic. “Yep” sounds so disinterested, like you'd rather be anywhere else than here, when that might be partially true, but you're not trying to sound like a dick. “Same here” sounds like such a sarcastic tone, and “Of course I'm here, you're the one who forced me into this” would sound too rude.
Instead, you just say nothing, which she notices, of course.
“What, no smart shits today?”
“I have nothing to say to you,” you mutter as you turn your attention to the red motor behind her. You notice the scuffed up leather seat and the worn tires.
You then glance around the parking lot, wondering how many times you've seen this before. The motorcyclist who's always late to class, the seniors who smoke too much and are always ditching school, the students with cars who love to show off the brand new car their parents gave them, and the popular girls gossiping about some poor girl who can't afford nice clothes.
The sound of a motorcycle engine starting snaps you out of your thoughts, and you look up to see Vi getting onto the motorcycle
She pats the back seat behind her. “You getting on or what?”
“...is it like fast?”
“Is it like fast?"” she mimics in a childish tone before rolling her eyes. “Yeah, it's fast. Get on it and find out.”
“I just asked a question, no need to be a dick.”
“Are you always this bitchy?” she asks, then throws you a helmet. “Put this on.”
You catch the helmet, and you put it on. “Only around you.” You approach the motor and try not to comment on the poor condition and instead climb on behind her.
You have no idea what to do with your legs, so for a few seconds, you just awkwardly sit behind her, trying to position yourself like riding a horse.
“Are you gonna hold on?” Vi calls out.
“Hold on to what?”
“Me, dumbass. Grab my waist.”
“Hell no.”
“It's for your own safety.”
“I'm fine,” you shift around, trying to find a comfortable position.
Vi seems to start losing her patience with you. “If you want to fall off the bike mid ride and splatter onto someone's yard like a squashed bug, be my guest.”
That gets you to hold onto her waist out of pure spite.
“Just don't squeeze my abs too tight. I still need air.”
You scoff. “Who the hell is so narcissistic that they think something as simple as that would affect me?”
She huffs, amused by your snark, and puts on her own helmet. “It's not narcissism. It's just a joke,” she retorts.
You scoff again, but your hand tightens around her waist reflexively.
She chuckles. “Knew you couldn't resist.”
You pinch her waist. “Just shut up and drive.”
She snorts. “Touchy, aren't we?”
“Yeah, I am,” you reply sarcastically, pinching her waist again.
“Hey!” she exclaims, then sighs. “Okay, fine. I'll stop, just stop it.”
She starts the motor, and the hum of the engine vibrates throughout your body. It's louder being sat on top of the thing compared to how it sounds when you're on the ground. You feel this rumble throughout your chest, and you really want to comment on the poor thing making that much noise.
“Just hold on tight.”
—
“FUCK YEAH! WOOO!” you shout, punching the air with your fist and standing up. It's hockey, but who cares? you're not a fan, not in the slightest, but you're still screaming and cheering, all in a bid to support the team.
Vi is right beside you, shouting as well, while she eats a hot dog and washes it down with soda. “I thought you hated hockey!” she shouts over the crowd's cheers.
You shrug, but it's impossible to respond. You can't hear each other over the sound of the audience's cheers.
A few of the people sitting in the same section as you give you some weird looks, like you suddenly went insane. Well, can you really blame them? it probably looks like you have the sudden urge to yell random things for no reason.
Vi is the only one who doesn't look at you like you're some lunatic, her gaze is focused on the game, all while cheering, and occasionally making comments about the players.
It's different compared to watching it on TV. You're actually there, in person, surrounded by people who share your excitement and are as loud as you or louder.
You're also next to the most annoying person ever, but you don't want to dwell on that.
You drop down, back into your seat, and lean back, stretching your legs out. Your thighs and legs are starting to feel like jelly from all that screaming and standing. “Damn,” you tell her, shaking your legs. “I think I just strained a muscle or something.”
Vi laughs and sits down on her seat. “You know, I've been around here for years now. I probably know some people here.” She glances around the crowd of people, scanning them like she's trying to find someone in particular.
“Oh yeah? who's that in the third row then?”
She follows the direction of your finger and immediately points at a random person. “That's Fred! I once went to elementary with him.”
You have no idea if she's making that up or not. “And what about the guy next to him with the big hat?”
Vi squints at the section you pointed at. “That's George.” She then points at a girl with a black jacket. “That's Sneha,” she pauses, her eyes catching someone in the distance, “and oh-” her hand abruptly changes direction, pointing forward, “-that's Jenny,” she says, waving her hand. “Yo, Jen!”
The old lady turns around and nods her greeting. “Hi sweetheart, how's it going?”
“Doing good, gramps. Just watching the game with this one.” She nudges at you.
The old lady turns to look at you, her face taking the form of a smile. “Ah, a girlfriend, I see.”
Girlfriend? What's she talking about? “Um, no. Just a friend.”
Vi's eyebrows rise as her whole mouth goes ajar. “Friend?” she repeats, “We're friends now?”
“Only for today. Don't get used to the idea.”
The old lady hums. “Is that so? well, enjoy the game, children.”
“Yeah, yeah, we will,” Vi responds to the old lady, and once the lady turns back to watch the game, she leans in close, bumping her shoulder into yours. “That's Jen. She's basically the team's grandma,” Vi explains. “She's been here for years, goes to almost every game.”
You watch the lady continue to watch the game. “So she's like a regular here.”
“Yeah, sometimes she talks about how things were better in ‘her day.’”
“You two seem close though,” you point out.
“She's old and friendly,” she says, scratching her cheek. “Plus, old ladies are always fond of me. I helped her one time with her groceries after one game, and now she thinks I'm a sweetheart.” Vi shrugs, taking another bite of her hotdog. “She's also a nice lady. Always has candy and stuff to give out to everyone.”
“Candy, huh?”
“Yep,” she swallows and smacks her lips to get any food out from her mouth. “She always has peppermint discs, peppermint sticks, and chocolate sticks in her bag.”
“Why do you know that?”
“Everyone knows that.”
“Why does she have candy anyway?”
Vi takes another bite. “Just something she likes to give out,” she says, between chews, then points at the old lady's lap. “That blue thing she's knitting is actually a hat. She likes to give that out too.”
“Really?”
Vi shrugs again, eating yet another mouthful of her food, still somehow managing to speak at the same time. “Yeah, and don't be fooled by the knitting and the candy. She could beat you in a game of arm wrestling. She's still really buff.”
You nod silently, impressed with this old lady.
When Vi swallows the last bit of her hotdog, she pulls out her phone and points it at you. “I'm gonna take a picture of you... and put it on Tinder.” The second the camera's click sounds off, it takes everything in you to not grab her phone and throw it across the goddamn stadium.
She continues taking pictures, each time saying something different, like, “Look at this one,” or “This one's really good.” She holds up the phone, showing you a picture that's... actually not half bad. But you know giving her that reaction would just fuel her to do more, so instead, you scoff.
You turn your attention back to the stadium, trying to ignore whatever she's doing beside you. You look around. There are a surprising amount of men, guys, dudes, bros, etc. It's like they outnumber the women.
“There's a lot of dudes in here,” you comment. “Is it a testosterone fest over here, or what?”
Vi looks around as well. “Yep.”
“Do you think any of these guys like girls who love sports?”
Vi snorts. “Nah,” she replies, shoving her phone back into her pocket. “They're more interested in a girl who looks good in a jersey and knows how to bring them a cold beer.”
“So… basically they're only interested if we look cute and we don't open our mouths?”
“Pretty much.”
You groan. “I hate guys like that.”
“Hey, some guys aren't that bad,” she remarks.
“Yeah, and they're the ones in relationships.”
She thinks about it for a moment. “You know… I'm surprised you're not in a relationship.”
You give her a weird look. “Why?”
“Well, you're... y'know… cute.”
Is that a compliment or a fact? you are cute, you're aware of that, but still, it's weird how she said it and... did it look like there was a hint of something else in her tone of voice when she said that?
You force a smile, trying to brush it off. “Thanks.”
You both sit in silence for a moment, a silence you really want to fill with literally anything else than this weird awkwardness.
Just when the awkward silence couldn't possibly get more awkward, a sudden cheer from the crowd interrupts your thoughts. They're all looking up at something on top of the stadium. You furrow your brows before looking up, trying to see what it is they're looking at.
Your eyes land on the huge TV that's attached to the ceiling, and you see the words ‘KISSING CAM’ flashing in bright letters. The camera pans through the crowd, searching for a couple, and it lands on a couple who's sitting not too far from you.
“KISS! KISS! KISS!” You look over at Vi and see her cupping her hands over her mouth. She's standing up and shouting at the couple to kiss.
You watch as the girl looks up and sees the camera pointed towards her and her boyfriend. She whispers something to him, and it doesn't take a genius to know what she just said. The guy grins and leans in, giving his girlfriend a sloppy, wet kiss.
The crowd goes crazy, cheering and whistling. The couple pulls away from each other, both of them smiling.
You look at Vi again, who's still standing up. She seems to be enjoying this a lot more than you are, and you can see hearts in her eyes.
Once it seems like the camera has recorded enough footage, it moves to the next couple.
It goes to a couple sitting not too far away from you. The guy looks uncomfortable, but his girlfriend is completely eager to show some public affection. She grabs his chin and kisses him, but it’s only a quick, chaste kiss.
Vi yells out, “Come on, put some effort into it!” and then she sits down, leaning back in the chair.
The camera pans through the crowd again, skipping over several couples until finally landing on a group of guys. They look like they're having the time of their life, yelling at the camera and making rude gestures.
“Ah, boys…” an older man next to you sighs.
The camera captures the guys for a while, they're all laughing and having a good time.
The camera moves away from the group of guys and lands on Vi and a girl sitting right next to her.
Vi immediately makes some hand gestures, shaking her head and probably saying no. “We're not-” but before she can finish, the camera moves away from them, unsatisfied with this answer, and lands on the other girl sitting next to Vi.
You.
Fuck.
“KISS! KISS! KISS!” you hear someone, it sounds like the same person who cheered on the other couples.
You look over at Vi, who's watching you with this stupid smile on her face. You glare at her, she's clearly enjoying this way too much.
You lean over to her, through clenched teeth, you hiss, “This isn't funny.”
She shrugs, still smiling. “I think it is.”
“Well, I don't.”
“It's only a kiss.”
“It’s still embarrassing.”
“Oh come on, it's Valentine's Day!” she replies. “What? are you worried that you'll suck at kissing or something?”
“Excuse me? I am an excellent kisser.”
“Oh yeah?” She quirks an eyebrow. “Then why are you so worried about this? it won't be some gross open mouth kiss, it'll be just a little peck.”
You narrow your eyes at her. “Because I don't want to be seen kissing in public, in front of hundreds of people,” you say, lowering your voice, “And I definitely do not want to kiss you.”
“Come on, you don't have to sound so disgusted by the idea of kissing me.”
“Because I am,” you say simply. “I don't want to kiss you anymore than you'd want to kiss me.”
“I never said I didn't want to kiss you.”
That statement takes you by surprise, you had just assumed that she would be grossed out by the thought of kissing you.
The chants start to get louder as more and more people join in. “KISS! KISS! KISS!”
You hear the same guy from before. “Kiss! c'mon! it's just a quick kiss, do it.”
You hear another girl from behind you. “Oh, come on! one little kiss! what's the big deal?”
It's no big deal.
But at the same time, you're starting to panic. You don't even know how to act right now, are you supposed to play along with this? are you supposed to ignore it? what the hell is happening?!
Your brain is starting to mush into mush because why are so many people chanting? why are they making such a big deal out of this? it's just a kiss, right? right… so why are you so nervous?
You turn your head to see Vi looking at you, her eyes staring into your soul.
“A kiss on the cheek will do,” she says aloud.
You're going to die.
Your heart is going to explode right here, in the middle of the stadium, and then your guts are going to spill out right in front of everybody.
Maybe it's best just to get this over with?
All you have to do is... just a kiss on the cheek. That's it.
You just have to get it over with before this turns into something bigger.
You're not really gonna enjoy this, you'd just get the feeling like you should have brushed your teeth harder in the morning.
Vi's not even attractive in the way that you would want to kiss her cheek, her skin probably sucks from waking up in the mornings, there's no way she remembers to wash her hair at least three times a week. What about her breath? There is no way that she actually brushes her teeth every day. Her breath probably tastes like stale cheetos and mountain dew. There is no way you're gonna get a single bit of pleasure from kissing her cheek.
But you do it anyway.
You press a kiss on her cheek, and it's... warm, and they burn under your lips. The smell of her body spray isn't overwhelming. It's subtle and pleasant. Her hair isn't as greasy as you imagined, and it feels kinda nice when your fingers brush against the side of her face. Her breath doesn't even smell like mountain dew and cheetos, it's actually minty and fresh, like she just ate a pack of gum.
You pull your face away before you let your brain get to you, but you just keep looking at her face because there is this huge grin plastered on her face that makes your heart beat faster. Her cheeks look red, and the tips of her ears are even red too.
The crowd goes nuts. You can barely hear the music or the announcers over the chanting. The kiss had lasted all but a few seconds, but the feeling on your lips linger.
You're both looking at each other like you've just seen each other for the very first time.
She's actually gorgeous.
How is it possible that you only now realized how beautiful she looks?
You look away, but even in your peripheral vision, you can see her looking at you. There's still a stupid grin on her face, and she looks happy.
She's actually happy that you kissed her on the cheek.
—
You and Vi are sitting in the parking lot after the game ends. Vi had bought some $5 pizza, but since the place is packed, you're now sitting in the parking lot with Vi's motorcycle parked behind you.
“I'm gonna be honest,” Vi starts, her face twisted up as she chews on a slice of pizza. “This is the best meal I’ve ever had.”
You hum, nodding along.
Vi takes another bite, a big one, and chews on it, her cheeks stuffed. She swallows and sighs contently. “Man, I should have bought two boxes,” she grumbles, looking down at the one last slice left in the box. Then, she looks up, straight at you, and grins. “You want the last slice?” she offers, holding up the box with the slice still left in it.
You shake your head, and she looks at you with skepticism. “Are you sure you don't want it?”
“I had three slices already, I'm fine.”
Vi looks at the slice of pizza that's still in the box, then at you. She looks like she's considering something, then shrugs and pops the slice into her mouth. “Suit yourself,” she says, the words garbled since her mouth is still full of food.
Something about this moment feels... comfortable. Strangely comfortable.
It's weird. You don't understand why you don't feel threatened or uncomfortable or annoyed or any of those things, even though she's sitting right next to you.
But, oddly enough, you feel safe.
Or maybe that's just because you can't think of anything to say.
Or maybe it's because the silence isn't awkward.
Or maybe it's because you're distracted by the way she seems to enjoy her food.
Because... it's so... weirdly satisfying, watching her chew her food, watching her swallow, watching her use the back of her hand to wipe off the sauce on her chin.
You have no idea why you're paying attention to those little details.
But... you are.
You're not sure when you started paying attention to those.
You're not sure why you feel so comfortable around her right now.
You're not sure of a lot of things, actually.
You're not sure how to feel at the moment, or when your dislike of her had dwindled down to... whatever the hell this is, to whatever this weird, unfamiliar feeling in your chest is.
You're not sure why the corners of your lips keep trying to twitch upwards every time she makes some stupid face.
You're not sure why you're fine sitting in the freezing cold of the parking lot. Not even on the motorcycle, but on the cold ass ground, just sitting behind the motor, back leaned against it.
You're just fine sitting here, and you're just fine knowing that after this, you'll have to go back home and deal with a bunch of bullshit again.
You don't get it.
What changed?
She used to get on your nerves, and you used to get on hers.
She's still the same, isn't she?
And you're still the same.
Everything, suddenly, feels... different.
The air feels different, the atmosphere feels different, the whole world feels different.
The only thing that hasn't changed is her.
Well, no, that’s a lie.
She has changed.
She feels different.
She's not the same girl you can't stand.
And you're not the same girl she can't stand.
Everything is just different.
Maybe the two of you had changed.
But you're not sure how.
You're not even sure when you started noticing it.
But those little details about her, those little behaviors and quirks and habits that you used to find irritating and annoying… they're not bothering you anymore.
She's still a pain in the ass, but she's... well, a tolerable one.
For now.
You don't understand.
Or, rather, you won't allow yourself, at least not yet.
Because you're not sure how to process everything.
And, honestly, you're afraid to even try.
You look at her, still eating on the slice of pizza, and there's a small smear of sauce on the corner of her mouth. “You've got something on your face.”
She tilts her head. “I do? Where?”
Your eyes slowly move down, from her eyes to her nose, and then... her lips. Then, you notice something... freckles. She has freckles. little ones, spread across the bridge of her nose and cheeks, and they're… really cute, really, really-
What in ever loving hell are you thinking?
“Hello? you alive over there?”
You snap out of it. You're not about to let her see you be weak just because she happens to have a pretty face. “You had something right… here,” before she can respond, you raise your hand, reaching for her cheek. You wipe the sauce off the corner of her mouth with your thumb. Your thumb accidentally brushes against her lower lip, and something in your chest twitches.
Vi freezes, her eyes widening as you touch her lips.
Everything feels... slower.
You can hear the sound of her breathing as she exhales, how it hitches when you brush your thumb along her lower lip.
You don't know how, or when, but you find yourself leaning closer to her, your hand still cupped on her cheek.
Her gaze flicks to your lips, her own parting slightly.
...
Holy shit.
You snatch your hand away, realizing what you just did.
Damn it, what the fuck?
You quickly stand up, trying to regain your composure. “I-” Your voice comes out as a croak. You clear your throat, trying to sound normal. “I should... get home. I think it's getting late.”
Vi is still sitting on the ground, and then she shakes her head, as if waking herself up. “...right. Yeah, it is getting late.” She slowly stands up.
“I... umm…” you start awkwardly. “I should-”
“I'll... drive you home,” she interrupts whatever you were about to say.
Your head snaps up, surprised by the offer. “What? You don't have to-”
“I want to.” Her tone leaves no room for argument, so you shut your mouth. You don't want to prolong this weird, confusing moment anyway.
—
Vi's motorcycle comes to a stop in front of your house. The engine making that clunky, sputtering sound before it finally dies.
“We're here,” you say, trying to break the awkward silence that has been between the two of you since you got on the motorcycle.
You manage to finally slide off the motorcycle, but unfortunately, you're still attached to the helmet. You attempt to unbuckle the chin strap, but the damn thing seems to be glued to your head.
“Ugh, this piece of crap,” you mutter, struggling with it.
“Here, let me-” she cuts in, reaching for the straps.
“No, I got it,” you insist.
“I know you can, but let me.”
You glare at her, feeling stubborn, but it's not like you're getting anywhere. “Fine.” You let your hands fall to your sides as she reaches for the straps.
She unbuckles it with ease, finally freeing your head from its confines.
You take the helmet off and give it to her, trying to not make eye contact. “Thanks.”
There's a moment of what could be an awkward silence before you both speak at the same time.
“So-”
“I-”
You cough awkwardly. “Go ahead.”
“No, you can speak first-”
“No, no, I insist. Go ahead-”
“I'm fine-”
“Stop being stubborn-”
“Says you-”
“Yeah, I am stubborn-"
“Shut up-”
“Make me-”
What did she say? Was that... an invitation?
“Are you challenging me-”
She snorts. “Pfft, no, that-”
“Then why would you say something like that?”
“I don't know, thought it'd be funny.”
“It wasn't.”
“It was a little funny.”
“No, it wasn't,” you scoff. “Whatever. You were saying?”
“Oh, yeah,” she replies, shifting on the motorcycle. “I just wanted to say…” Her gaze shifts from you to the side, then back to you. “I just wanted to... say that I had... fun today. Yeah…” She shrugs. “What about you? what were you sayin'?”
Huh. “I guess it wasn't the worst thing that ever happened to me.”
“Wow,” she says, deadpan. “So glad you're not completely miserable being around me.”
“Don't get your hopes up too high, it's just for today, remember?” you remind her.
“Yeah, I remember, I'm not an idiot.”
“Could have fooled me,” you retort, and a smirk makes its way to your face.
“Watch it,” she warns, the corners of her mouth curving upwards. “I'm only tolerating you today.”
“The feeling is mutual,” you quip back.
The two of you share a look and then start laughing. You're glad she's starting to loosen up a little.
“Alright alright, truce?” She holds out her fist.
You roll your eyes but bump your fist with hers anyway. “Truce.”
There's another silence, but it doesn't feel... awkward like the last ones.
Then, she speaks up, “Well... I guess I should go.”
“Yeah,” you reply. “I guess you should.”
“See you at school, then?”
“Unfortunately,” you grumble. You take a step back, getting ready to turn around and head to the front door.
“Hey,” she suddenly says.
You glance back at her, raising an eyebrow in question.
“Can I…” she starts, then hesitates, “...can I ask you something?”
You shrug. “Yeah, go ahead.”
“Just... promise me you won't be mad,” she hedges, not quite looking at you directly.
“I'm not promising anything-”
“Just... humor me.”
“Fine. I promise I won't get mad.”
She takes a deep breath. “Do... do you… do you actually hate me?” You're silent for a moment, trying to find the words, but she starts backpedaling. “Ugh, never mind, I shouldn't have asked, forget it, it doesn't matter-”
“No, no-" you interject, “I don't- I don't hate you.”
“You don't?”
“No... I don't hate you.”
“You sure?” she presses, leaning forward on the motorcycle, resting her arms on the handlebars. “Then why are you always so pissy whenever you're around me?”
“I dont-” you start, then stop. “I'm not-” you start again and stop again. “Remember that time in science lab?”
“When we lit the bunsen burner, the table caught on fire, we got three detentions, and everyone thought we were going to be expelled?” she recalls.
“Yes… that time.”
“Seriously? that was months ago.”
“I never said I was the most forgiving person.”
“It was a mistake,” she points out. “I didn't mean to do it, I was just being stupid.”
“It was still your fault. You didn't look at the instructions.”
“I was distracted,” she counters.
“By what, your big brain? cause you definitely weren't paying attention to the experiment instructions.”
She looks away, shifting uncomfortably on her motorcycle. “Actually, I was distracted by something…” her eyes return to yours, “-someone.”
“You're making it sound like it was a person you were crushing on or something.”
She falls silent, looking away again.
Wait.
Hold on.
What?
“Wait—wait a minute,” you demand, walking closer to her.
“What?”
“You were being distracted because you were crushing on someone during the science lab? That was the reason that whole thing happened? You couldn't keep yourself from being distracted because you were crushing on someone?”
“That's not fair to say,” she protests.
“Not fair to say?” you repeat, scoffing. “I literally got three detentions because you were more interested in staring at someone-”
“Fine! Whatever. Maybe I was distracted, maybe I wasn't paying attention-” she admits defensively “-maybe I was looking at-” she cuts herself off again. “Whatever, I'm going home.” She starts her motorcycle, not glancing at you.
“Hey-” you reach out, grabbing her arm. “Wait.”
“What do you want?”
“What was that person's name?”
“What does it matter?”
“Cause, I have a hunch.”
“Care to share this hunch with me?”
“Uh, Caitlyn Kiramman…?”
She snaps her head to you, eyes tracing up and down. “Are you actually this clueless?” she sneers, then drives away, leaving you alone on the sidewalk.
“Hey!” you shout. “Seriously, what is your problem?” you call out after her. “We were having a decent conversation, why did you-”
Suddenly, she stops, braking abruptly in the middle of the sidewalk with a quick skid. Before you can say, or think, she has her motorcycle facing you once again. She swings her leg over and hops off, walking up to you with a determined look.
“You want to know my problem?” she asks, coming closer. “I'll tell you my problem.” She grabs your shoulders, forcing you to step back. “My problem is that it's been years. Years, and you still have no idea, do you? you're still just as clueless as always.”
“What are you-” you stumble, struggling to keep your footing. Her hands are tight around your shoulders, holding you in place.
“You keep saying I'm the one who causes trouble, I'm the one who always makes your life harder-” she continues. “But you-”
You manage to find your footing and look at her face.
“-don't seem to get that you're just as guilty of making my life miserable.”
“Vi-” you start, but she doesn't let you finish.
“Every time you smile at me, every time you look at me, every time you talk to me.” She shakes you. “Every time you do something stupid, which is all the goddamn time,” she spits. “You don't seem to get that it drives me insane.” She huffs, letting go of you. “I've been right in front of you this whole damn time, and you just didn't even-”
“Didn't what?”
“You had no idea, did you? You don't understand why I’m so damn irritable whenever I'm with you, you don't get why I'm always trying to pick fights, why I can't just be civil, why I can't just be normal around you… you just think I'm a jerk!”
“Well, maybe you are. You did just grab me like a fucking maniac.”
“Oh, shut up,” Vi snaps. “Just shut up for a second.”
You shut up.
She takes a deep breath. “You think I enjoy this?” she asks, and the question sounds genuine enough that you regret the ‘maybe you are’ comment.
She scoffs. “I don't. I wish more than anything that I could just be calm and civil and… and nice around you. But instead, I'm always getting into your face, I'm always picking at you, I'm always trying to piss you off, because it's the only goddamn way I can get your attention.”
“Any time I try to be normal around you,” she continues, “I get... I get ignored. You act like I'm not even there. But the second I get in your face, the second I do something stupid or obnoxious-” she gestures at herself, “-suddenly, you're right there. You're looking right at me, you're talking to me, for once, you're actually paying attention to me-”
“Why do you even care about my attention?!” You don't mean for it to come out as angry as it does, but the pure confusion you feel causes you to raise your voice.
Vi looks away, a frown twisting her lips, before she snaps her gaze back to you. She sounds oddly embarrassed when she speaks. “Maybe because I'm completely, miserably, head over heels in love with you, okay?!”
Wait... what the actual fuck?
Vi looks away, the words leaving her in a rush. “I'm in love with you,” she repeats, quieter and slower. “There's no maybe about it. I've literally been in love with you since middle school.”
“So, instead... instead of just telling me,” you start, “you... you decided to be a jerk to me for the past six years?!”
“I was twelve!” Now her attention is fully on you as she gestures at herself. “I was a dumb kid, I didn't know what to do, but I was desperate for you to notice me. Every time I tried being nice, I got ignored, so... I guess I decided that if you weren't going to notice me in a good way, then I was just gonna piss you off and make you notice me in a bad way.”
“And then, I just kept doing it,” she continues, “because then, you would notice me, and you'd talk to me, and at least you weren't ignoring me. It became a habit. It was the same damn cycle every day. So, you know, I'm sorry if I don't suddenly know how to behave like a normal goddamn human being around you.”
She looks at you defiantly, she's expecting a fight, an argument, and the last thing she expects is for you to... laugh
You laugh. You don't laugh because you think it's funny, you laugh because you're so unbelievably shocked and overwhelmed that the only thing you can do is laugh. You try to cover it up, you try to muffle your laugh by bringing your hand to your mouth, but it's too late, you've already laughed.
“Why are you laughing?” she asks. “I'm being serious, okay? this isn't a joke, it's not some sort of prank. I am dead serious—I just confessed to you, and you start laughing? Jesus, you're actually heartless, you-”
You manage to get your laughter under control, your body still shaking with a few silent chuckles, but you manage to speak in between your breaths. “You have the worst-” and another chuckle, “-worst timing, I swear to god.”
“Oh I'm so sorry that my confession didn't please all of your fucking needs,” Vi says sarcastically, “but I've spent god knows how long in love with you, and I just had to take my shot. And what are you doing? You're laughing at me. Because your pride can't stand-”
“Would you shut up for like two seconds?!” you snap, cutting off her rant in an instant. “I'm not laughing because you confessed to me, okay?!”
“Then why are you laughing, huh? why is this so funny to you? because I don't find it very funny-”
“Because-” you sigh, and you're actually surprised by how... nervous you suddenly feel. “I never expected this, okay? I never expected you to actually... feel that type of way about me, and to top that, you're confessing to me in the stupidest way possible.”
“I didn't plan on confessing to you at all!” she protests. “It just... kind of happened. Plus, you've never been too keen on me.”
“I-” you begin because 'not keen on you' feels like an understatement. You've never liked her, or rather you've never let yourself even consider her as an option because your heart was set on one person only. “I just need some time to... process this.”
Vi scoffs, her face looking annoyed again. “You need time to process this? what's there to process? I just told you how I feel about you.”
“Yeah, well, I need to process that! Because you just dumped a lot of information on me, and right now I'm-” You pause, trying to pick just the right word. “...overwhelmed, okay?”
Vi's features soften, not quite fully, but just enough to show a little bit of sympathy. “Overwhelmed,” she repeats.
“Yeah…” you reply, “I mean... you just confessed to me, and I... I've never-” you gulp. “-I've never really thought of you... that way.”
“Never thought of me, or never let yourself think of me?”
Okay, woah, that's... a very accurate question.
She's right, and it's scary that she just pointed that out.
Maybe in the back of your head, you've wondered things, you've had thoughts, but it was all so brief, you've always been quick to brush them away. It never even crossed your mind that maybe you had been missing out on something.
You're not sure how to reply, and it gives Vi a chance to continue talking.
“You never let yourself think of me like that, huh?” she continues, “That's pretty sad, because I've literally been in love with you for the past six years.”
“Don't guilt trip me,” you snap. “It's not like I asked you to fall in love with me, is it?”
“I'm not guilt tripping you. I'm just trying to get you to understand how I feel. I'm just trying to make you see that I...care about you, okay? I'm not trying to—ugh!” She groans, rubbing a hand over her face. “I'm screwing this up, I'm screwing everything up, because apparently I suck at confessing and you… you mess with my head.”
“I mess with your head?” you repeat. “You're the one who's messing with my head! You're the one who's messing with my emotions, you—you just turned my entire life upside down, and you expect me to respond to it perfectly?!”
“Not perfectly!” she retorts. “You're seriously not getting it, are you? All I want is for you to-”
“What do you want then? you want me to say that I feel the same way about you? that I've secretly been in love with you for years and never said anything?”
“No, that's not what I— that's not what I want you to say at all!” She runs her fingers through her hair and pushes it out of her face because the haircut she has gets everywhere. “All I want you to say is that you'll even consider me as an option! I just want you to give me a chance. Is that so much for me to ask for?”
You groan to yourself. “Look, if you like me that much, then maybe you should at least make an effort… and then maybe... I'll give you a chance!” With that, you walk towards the front door.
Vi doesn't respond, not immediately, she just stands there watching you leave, a stunned look on her face. But she manages to shake herself out of that stupor in time to follow you.
“Are you serious...?"
“You want me? You gotta work for it,” you respond without slowing your footsteps.
“Woah woah woah, what? work for it?” she sputters, trying to keep up with you. “What more do you want from me?”
“I want-” You stop in front of the door, suddenly turning around to her. “-I want you to prove how serious you are. Just confessing to me isn't going to change everything, and if you're being serious,” you jab a finger to her chest, “then prove it.”
“And how exactly am I supposed to prove myself, huh? Please, tell me, because I'm really at a loss here.”
“I don't know, figure it out.” You shrug. “You claim to be in love with me, right? and if that really were the case, then you have six whole years worth of feelings inside that-” you point at her “-that heart of yours, and you better damn use it.”
“Fine,” she says, and her tone is determined. “You want me to prove it? I'll prove it. I'll prove it so much, you're going to be drowning in how much I prove it. I'm going to do everything just to win your heart. Just watch.”
That sounds cheesy, but... you'd be lying if you said you weren't intrigued. You scoff, turning around and opening the door, but not before saying, “We'll see about that.”
—
Vi stares at the closed door, her thoughts completely occupied with your words.
Prove it.
She shakes her head, a grin on her face as she walks back to her motor.
You and her have had a rocky past, but she's determined to wipe the slate clean.
Vi swings her leg over her motor. She grips the handles tightly and starts the ignition.
She's going to start from the ground zero with you.
And by god, she will prove herself.
#arcane#vi#arcane vi#vi arcane#violet arcane#arcane violet#arcane x reader#arcane x female reader#arcane x you#arcane x y/n#vi x reader#vi x female reader#vi x you#vi x y/n#vi imagines#violet x reader#fluff#valentines#valentines day#one sided enemies#angry confessions#head over heels vi? fyck yeah
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just a friend
masterlist
requests are open
summary: your best friend gets jealous when he sees you talking to some random guy at his party
words count: 3k
warnings: +18❗️smut, swearing, p in v sex, protected sex, friends to lovers, possessive but softie Rafe, dirty talk, pet names
You were standing near the kitchen island, far away from everybody else, sipping on your drink and observing Rafe. The loud music busted through the speakers, there were too many unknown faces and for the hundredth time wished you had stayed at home.
Rafe was sitting on the couch in the middle of the room with Kelse, Topper, a few other guys, and, most importantly, some random girl. She was way too touchy for your liking and it honestly seemed like she was ready to get into his pants in front of everyone.
Rafe didn't pay much attention, though, even while she was rubbing his pants-covered thigh and saying something in his ear. No, Rafe was too interested in the conversation with his friend, but it didn't stop that nasty and overwhelming feeling of jealousy bubbling in your stomach.
You and Rafe have been friends for almost three years, but it didn't seem like it. While you had neved crossed the invisible line, unknowningly for each other you both admitted to yourself that whatever was going on in between you two was not a regular friendship. Friends shouldn't sleep in each other's beds. Friends shouldn’t spend that much time together alone. Friends shouldn't be jealous every single time someone talks to their friend. And friends shouldn't be in love.
Yet, here you were.
You were staring at this scene for at least fifteen minutes and it drove you fucking insane. Especially the fact that Rafe had never let any man even talk to you, not to mention be all up in your face. It was so unfair that he had double standards for you and that he probably didn't even realize your feelings for him.
Rafe was just too overprotective and possessive and you had to admit the ugly truth to yourself that it wasn't because he was in love with you.
You finished your drink, wincing at the taste of alcohol, and straightened, looking across the room full of people. There were too many guys; you spotted the one that looked kind of attractive and moved in his direction. You were done with Rafe’s bullshit. If he could have girls all over himself, so could you.
“Hey.” You tapped on the guy’s shoulder to grab his attention. He became flirty way too quickly, stepping closer to you and giving his best smirk, yet your eyes were still drifting back to Rafe.
You saw the exact moment when your best friend noticed your current company. You and Ed were chatting for no more than five minutes, and while he was talking about it being his plans for the night, you saw Rafe getting up from the couch with a frown on his face. He quickly crossed the room, not bothering to check on the girl who was trying to get his attention over the loud music, or say even say something to his friends.
“What are you doing here?” His brows furrowed even more, his eyes going up and down the guy near you.
“I’m talking, Rafe. Go back to your company.” You rolled your eyes, looking back at Ed. “So what were you saying? Your frie—”
“You’re coming with me, Y/N.” Before you could even say anything, you were dragged away to the second floor, where no one could bother you. “What the fuck was that, huh? I told you like a million fucking times to not talk to the guys at these damn parties; they're goin’ to hurt you.” Rafe freed your hand, pacing in front of you and running his own hand through his hair. He was visibly annoyed and pissed, and with the way he was acting, you wanted to push his buttons even more.
"You are my friend, Rafe, and you have no fucking right to tell me who I can and cannot speak to or go out with!" You shouted back, not even in the slightest fear of the flames in his eyes, when his head snapped back towards you.
"Whether you like it or not, Y/N, I am not going to let any fuckers with bad intentions get near you."
"Apparently, they are the only ones who are interested in me. You seem to be always busy with all the girls who are ready to climb you.” You laughed even though it hurt you to say it out loud. “I'm sick of your double standards, Rafe. You think I want to look at you with some random girls? You think it’s okay to scare guys away from me and then casually let everyone be all over you?”
“What the fuck does that mean? You know I am not dating anyone. They can do whatever they want because I have no plans with any of them." He rolled his eyes, already irritated that he was actually fighting with you for the first time. But there was no going back and you both felt it. The constant tension and secret feelings were overflowing and they had to find a way out. “You’re acting like a child, swear to god, babe.”
“Because you're giving me mixed signals and confusing me!” You stepped closer, pointing a finger at his chest.
“You know the reason why I do this.” Rafe grabbed your wrist, slightly pulling you closer. Your eyes locked on each other, and your faces were so close that you could smell liquor his his breath. You felt the way your stomach dropped when Rafe’s eyes quickly felt to your lips, yet you were still filled with anger.
"No, I don't! You’re giving me hope on something, you’re being affectionate with me, we’re spending all our time together, but then you just step back as if it was nothing! Just stop playing with my feelings and tell the fucking tr—-“ Before you could even finish your sentence, your body got pushed back and pressed in between the wall and Rafe’s body. His grip on your face was firm yet gentle enough to not hurt you when he brought you closer to him and finally kissed you.
You both moaned into the kiss as if you were surprised and content that it had finally happened. Rafe’s lips moved quickly, easily dominating over you, as he swiped his tongue over your bottom lip, asking for permission to slip in.
“I’m just a friend, huh? You’re driving me fucking insane. You’re mine, don’t you understand it?” He mumbled against your mouth, sliding one hand down your body and at the same time pushing his legs in between your thighs. He just simply wanted to pin you against the wall, but the way his thigh pressed into your pulsing core made you both hiss. “Do you really think I would let anyone kiss you? Touch you? I’m selfish, Y/N, and I don’t like to share anything or anyone.” You felt as if you were high or drunk with the way your body reacted to Rafe’s touches, trying to concentrate on his words but actually only wishing his lips to get back on yours.
“You let them touch you. That girl was all over you today, and you did nothing to prevent it.” You breathed into his lips, feeling a lazy smirk stretching across his own. Rafe leaned in again, pressing a few quick, wet kisses to your mouth and wrapping one hand harder around your body.
“She was fucking annoying and I tried to get her off of me. I don’t need any of them. My eyes have always been on you. I swear.” Rafe’s hands tugged on your dress, sliding it higher to have more access to your body. “Holy shit, Y/N. I don't know how I was able to be friends with you for so long. I want you so bad.”
You moaned, your head falling back against the wall, when Rafe’s lips slid down the side of your neck, leaving soft bites and reddish marks. Your own hands reached under his t-shirt, touching his firm abs and scratching his tanned skin until he moaned into your mouth.
“I was scared to make a move. To scare you away. But you are the best thing that has ever happened to me, and I cannot pretend to be only your friend." His hands were sliding up and down your thighs, bringing you closer and not pulling his face away from your neck. Your scent has always driven him insane and he couldn’t have enough of you. “Do you feel it? Do you feel how hard you make me, Y/N?” His hands tugged your hips closer, until his bulge was firmly pressing into your leg.
“Rafe…” You whined, your hips moving on his thigh, which was still pressed in between your legs. The feeling of your underwear getting wetter by the second made you wonder if Rafe could feel it through his pants. “Y-you know that everyone thinks that we’re sleeping together, right?”
“I think we shouldn’t disappoint them, hm?” You felt a smile spreading across his lips and you giggled back at him. Your hands are now tagging the annoying piece of fabric that hid his body from you, not even caring about people that might go to the second floor of Cameron’s house and catch you.
You managed to drag the t-shirt off of Rafe, your mouth instantly getting watery with the image in front of you. Sure, you saw Rafe shirtless countless times at the beach, but knowing that you could shamelessly do whatever you wanted made your whole body tingle.
“Fuck that.” Before you even knew it, Rafe’s hands easily lifted you up, making your legs automatically wrap around his body. His lips met yours again, and he started blindly moving towards his bedroom.
Your body bounced on the way-too-soft and way-too-expensive mattress of his king-size bed as he threw you there and went to lock the door. Rafe followed you shortly after, too desperate to keep touching you. His hands slid up your bare thighs, going past the strings of your panties, pushing your dress until it was gathered around your waist.
“Can I take it off?” He looked at you, his eyes surprisingly soft and completely different from what you'd expected. You just simply nodded, lifting your hands in the air, until the only real item of clothing was taken off you and thrown somewhere in the room.
Rafe’s eyes took every inch of your exposed skin, his hands gently sliding down your sides. You were only dressed in a simple black set, but for Rafe, it was the sexiest thing in the world.
He wanted you for so long. Just looking from afar, he was trying to restrict himself from getting closer to you because he had always thought that you deserved someone better. But at the same time, who could treat you better than him? Only Rafe knew everything that you liked and needed, and he was willing to give it to you.
“You’re so pretty, for fuck’s sake. I’ll be careful with you.” Rafe's body covered yours, his soft lips kissing your neck and going all the way down to your belly, making you gasp. You buried your hands in his hair, moving it away from his face. “I’ll take care of you. I promise I won’t fuck this up.” He looked up at you with his baby blues, and your whole body got covered in goosebumps from the look in his eyes.
“Please, Rafe.” You whispered, taking his face into your hands and dragging him back on top of you. You two could not stop moaning as your hands began to explore each other's bodies and your lips met once more in a passionate kiss. “I want you.”
“Baby… Can’t even imagine what you’re doing to me.” He groaned against your mouth. The position that you were currently in, with Rafe comfortably in between your slightly spread legs, made his pants-covered erection perfectly press into your dump panties. “Need to be inside of you or else you’ll make me cum in my pants.”
It became a mess of tugging on each other's clothes while trying to have as much skin-to-skin contact as possible. When you were both naked, Rafe slowed down, holding your face with one firm hand. “Is it really what you want to do? ‘Cause I won’t go back to pretending to be friends anymore.”
“Just fuck me already, Cameron.” You whispered, not breaking intense eye contact.
“As you wish, sweetheart.” With these words, Rafe pulled back to reach the nightstand and take a condon. He carelessly threw it near your exposed body and took a few seconds to finally admire your naked form.
You were basically inviting him to do whatever he wanted with your slightly spread legs, which let him see how wet you already were. That pleading look on your face didn’t help the situation either, making Rafe want to fuck you dumb until his name was the only thing on your mind.
He looked you up and down a few times before leaning forward, pressing your legs closer to your chest. Rafe’s calloused hands reached to your sensitive breasts, touching nipples with his thumbs, until your eyes rolled back into your head.
“Are you ready for me, or do you want me to eat you out first, hm?” His soft breath on the side of your neck sent shievers down your body. As much as you wanted to feel his lips on you, it felt like you could not think straight without his dick stretching you out, so you helplessly shook your head.
“Next time, please. I need you now.”
He gave you a sly smile and, in a single motion, ripped off the foil, rolled a condom over his throbbing cock, and placed himself at your entrance. You squirmed at the feeling of his tip going up and down your wet slit, gathering your juices and stimulating your sensitive clit.
“Fuck, so you’re soakin’ my sheets, baby.” He smirked, looking down at your pussy and teasing you more, until a moan of his name escaped from your mouth. “Keep your legs here, okay? ‘N I’ll take care of you.”
When you felt Rafe's cock slide into you, your eyes flattered before closing completely. It was big. It was bigger than you had ever had before, but it seemed like your body quickly adjusted to him as soon as he bottomed out. With one hand near your head to hold himself up and the other one on your leg, he slowly started moving in and out.
“Rafe!” You squeaked, digging your nails into your thighs and trying to control yourself.
“Sh-h, ‘s okay. Knew this pussy was made for me, babe.” He moaned through gritted teeth, gradually increasing the speed of his thrusts. Soon, the sound of skin slapping against skin filled the room, along with muffled moans and Rafe’s praises. His bed was making a noise with every movement, and if you hadn't been too lost in the pleasure, you would’ve thought about other people hearing you. Rafe could not take his gaze away from your face—the way you tried to control yourself but soon lost it when his cock touched that sensitive spot inside of you. Your glossy eyes, hot skin and puffy lips made him go feral, fucking you harder into the matress of his bed.
“That’s right, scream my name. Made ya go dumb for my cock, huh?” He watched in awe at the way you were going insane under him; your release was visibly getting closer with every thrust. You moan even louder, feeling a tight knot form in your lower stomach, and the feeling gradually increased when the base of his cock brushed over your clit. “Squeezin’ me so tight. My good girl... fuck, baby. That’s right, cum for me. I’ve got you.”
Rafe grabbed both of your hands, showing you to put them around his neck. It made your legs fall from the previous position and you weakly put them around his waist. Rafe finally lowered his face closer to you, catching your lips in a wet and sloppy kiss, still pounding into you roughly and steadily.
“I-I can’t, Rafe, please!”
You particularly breathe the same air, moan into each other’s mouths, hooded eyes locked on when the orgasm washes over you almost simultaneously. Without even realizing it, you dragged your nails down Rafe’s sweaty back, leaving red marks that he will proudly show off tomorrow. His hips slowly pushed into you while you were still pulsating around his cock, enjoying your own release. Just the feeling of your pussy milking him could’ve made him cum again.
“Rafe…” You whisper, your eyes now closed and your head feeling all fuzzy and warm. Rafe slowly slipped out of you, walking away to throw out a condom. You whined at the empty feeling and the coldness that the lack of his touch had brought.
“‘M right here, baby. You did amazing.” As he came back on top of you, now wearing boxers, he placed kisses on the heated skin of your neck, his hand sliding down your side to soothe the aching muscles of your legs. “My pretty girl... Gosh, now I’m not letting you go. Like ever.”
You giggle, draping your arms over his shoulders and playing with the hair at the nape of his neck. “So all I had to do was talk to some random guy for you to get all angry and kiss me?”
“Don’t remind me of that. I just realised that I might actually lose you.” Rafe whispered the last part, nuzzling into your neck and wrapping his arms around your waist until there was no space left between your naked bodies.
“You won’t lose me, I promise.” You hugged him back, enjoying the comfortable silence that fell into the room, until you both fell asleep in each other's arms.
#rafe cameron x reader#rafe x you#rafe cameron#rafe x reader#outerbanks rafe#rafe cameron x you#rafe smut#rafe cameron smut#rafe cameron imagine#rafe cameron fanfiction#rafe cameron x y/n#rafe cameron x female reader
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Can I please have cold stuffed cherry tomatoes, sausage rolls, tomato soup and kebab with boba, rose and mocha coffee served by Lando Norris? And a little dessert too 💕 my favorite track is Zandvoort
stuffed cherry tomatoes sugar daddy cold appetizer rough sex sausage rolls "I'll make it fit" tomato soup "Running away from my dick? I don't think so" kebab "Look at that, my cock is splitting you in half" boba anal rose spanking mocha coffee degradation dessert aftercare + matcha toys
Lando Norris x sugar baby!girlfriend!reader
TW: unprotected sex, cumming inside, PiA, anal, fingering, toys , size kink
WC: 2.1k
A/N: sugar daddy lando implied but not specified. also anal is like my biggest opp so I hope this doesn't suck
I stared at the track ahead of me from the comfortable space of McLaren’s hospitality. Everyone was quiet from the moment the last lap started, waiting for the result. I twisted the Cartier love bracelet Lando bought me a few weeks ago, insisting I needed to match with him, as I watched the race.
But my thoughts were somewhere else. All I could think about while watching Lando approaching the finish, heading for a win, was a conversation the two of us had last week at Lando’s (mine as well, I suppose) Monaco apartment.
✿ ✿ ✿
“You know, I’ve been thinking about something,” Lando said, breaking the comfortable silence we had fallen into right after sex, both of us too tired to move.
“Oh, have you?” I asked, sucking in a sharp breath when I felt his fingers run through my folds, collecting some of his cum that spilled from me. “Lando,” I said, my voice breathless as his fingers slipped and moved down to my ass, rubbing around my other hole.
He hummed, his fingers, lubed with his own cum still tracing circles around my anal opening. “I’ve been thinking about fucking you here.” He said, his voice deep and dripping with desire. “Taking you fully. Your ass is the only part of you I haven’t fucked yet, and I can’t stop thinking about it.”
“I don’t know,” I said, trying my best to keep myself composed. “I’ve never done that before.”
He growled, placing a kiss on the side of my neck. “That makes it all the sweeter, baby. That I could be the first to have you like that.”
I looked at him, we were laying on our sides, facing each other. His eyes were dark, intensely focused on me. I was quiet for a moment, thinking about his proposition.
Lando waited, patiently. But his hand never moved away.
Finally, I swallowed, opening my mouth to speak. “I’ll make you deal,” I said, my voice cracking. “You win the race next week, and I’ll let you fuck my ass.”
Lando smirked, moving his fingers away from my hole, and grabbing my ass. “Deal,” he said, the tone of his voice letting me know he was already planning the whole thing out in his head.
✿ ✿ ✿
The whole garage erupted in cheers when Lando crossed the finish line. Everyone was up on their feet and screaming in happiness as the signs displayed Lando as the winner. Bringing him another 25 points and further confirming McLaren’s position in the constructors championship.
I was still lost inside of my own head as I made my way outside just in time to see Lando getting out of his car. He took off his helmet and balaclava, shaking his head to move his hair that was stuck to his forehead.
He turned towards the crowd and his eyes met mine. A smile stretched over his lips as he ran up to me and hugged me over the fence. His hands wrapped around me possessively, his lips brushing my ear. “I hope you’re ready for tonight,” he said, his breath hot against my skin. “Because I’m excited for my reward.”
He pulled away, lips drawn in a smirk and eyes gleaming. Lando leaned down, giving me a hard kiss before moving along to shake hands with the rest of his team and then going to do interviews.
✿ ✿ ✿
Lando was impatient. I knew that from the moment he found me after the interview and dragged me back to the car, throwing some bullshit line about how he was too tired to go clubbing and would rather have a nice evening in, to his friends.
His hand stayed on my thigh the whole time he was driving us back to the hotel, making me squirm in my seat, and once we made it to the elevator his lips were on me as soon as the door closed.
“Lan,” I said, trying to catch my breath as the elevator finally came to our floor. “Come on, this is our floor.”
Lando dragged me out the moment that the elevator doors opened, his grip tight around my wrist. He swiped the card and pushed me inside of the door, slamming the door shut.
“Fuck, you don’t know how long I wainted for this.” He said, pressing his lips against mine in a bruising kiss as he groped my breasts. “Been hard ever since I got out of the fucking car.”
His fingers moved to unzip my dress, fingers fumbling with the zipper before he roughly tugged at it and the sound of material ripping filled the room.
“Lando!” I said, as he pushed what was no longer a wearable dress down my body and onto the floor. “The dress -”
He cut me off by roughly spanking my ass, the sound of it echoing through the room. “I bought it, I can rip it.” He growled, his hands squeezing my ass. He pushed my panties off, his fingers dipping between my ass cheeks and then he froze and I knew he felt it.
He pulled away slightly, his eyes meeting mine, the expression on his face unreadable. “What’s this baby?” He asked, his fingers brushing the edge of the butt plug I was wearing.
I giggled, placing my hands on his chest, my fingers working on unbuttoning his shirt. “Let’s say,” I started, pushing his shirt off his body and running my hands over his naked chest. “I was confident you were going to win today.”
Lando groaned, leaning towards me enough for his lips to brush mine but not actually kissing me. “I’m going to destroy you,” he said, his voice rough and leaving no room for argument.
Before I could even begin to think of my reply Lando pushed me towards the bed. He pulled off his jeans, leaving himself in his boxers, before sitting down on the bed. I looked at him, confused but the confusion was quickly gone when he pulled me over his lap.
“Lan, what are you doing?” I asked, not entirely used to this position. Sure, he had spanked me over his knee before but I was totally unprepared this time. He brought one of his hands down roughly, smacking one of my ass cheeks, making me yelp.
“That’s for making me wait.” He said, then hit my other cheek with enough force to make me jolt slightly forward. “And that’s for being a naughty girl and wearing a butt plug under your dress this whole time without telling me.”
He spread my ass cheeks and for a second he was silent before he spat between them, causing me to gasp at the feeling. “Look at you,” he said, his fingers running along my ass, collecting some of his spit. “Such a dirty little whore - and all for me.”
His fingers wrapped around the top of the plug, before he pulled it out of me, making me whine at the loss of fullness. I heard squirting of liquid and barely managed to turn around enough to see Lando putting lube on his fingers.
With no warning he pushed two of his fingers inside of my ass, replacing the plug. He started thrusting them into me slowly, dragging out each movement. “Are you gonna be a good girl for me and take my cock?” He asked, slightly speeding up the movement of his fingers.
I nodded, my hair falling over my eyes and blocking my vision. “Yes!” I whined, feeling my clit rub against his leg when he flexed his thigh, making me even more desperate. “Please Lando, need your cock! Need you to fuck my ass.”
That seemed to be enough for him. Wasting no time, Lando pulled me up and manhandled me onto the beg, pushing me onto my hands and knees. He stood behind me, gently rubbing one of his hands along my back while he squirted lube onto his dick with the other.
Once he lubed himself up, he moved the hand on my back so it was holding my waist, and then started slowly pushing himself inside of me.
The head of his cock slipped in and I found myself moaning out into the pillow below me. “Hurts!” I whined, because while I had stretched my ass a bit to prepare for this particular thing I had forgotten exactly how big Lando was.
“Do you want to stop?” He asked, the dominant facade cracking. I knew that if I wanted to stop he would, no questions asked, but that wasn’t what I wanted.
I shook my head, “No, don’t stop.”
He chuckled, slightly gripping my waist. “Then what’s the problem, baby?”
“Too big!”
“Too big?” He laughed, his tone mocking. “Oh, don’t worry sweet girl, I’ll make it fit.”
He waited a moment before pushing himself inside an inch more. I moaned at the feeling of him stretching my ass but the moan was quickly replaced by a scream as he roughly thrust the rest of his length into me.
Lando’s hand grabbed my hair, pulling my head up from the pillow I had buried it into. “See, I told you it would fit. I’ll always fit in you, you’re my whore afterall. Made to take my dick perfectly.”
He started out with an experimental thrust and when I moaned he began slowly speeding up. “Fuck, look at that,” Lando groaned. “My cock is splitting you in half.”
His thrusts became rougher and faster, his slapping against mine with each thrusts, his balls hitting against my clit. The stimulation was increasing and I hadn’t even realized I was trying to push myself towards the headboard until Lando’s arm wrapped around my stomach and he pulled me backwards, impaling me on his dick.
“Running away from my dick baby?” He questioned, his voice holding a mocking edge. “I don’t think so.”
I felt like my body was burning from all the stimulation I was experiencing and when Lando’s hand sneaked around my body and his finger started rubbing my clit my arms turned into jelly. No longer having the strength to support my upper body, I let myself fall deeper into the mattress, my face buried in the pillow.
“Lando, so good!” I whined, the sound of my voice muffled by the pillow. “Gonna cum, I’m gonna cum!”
Lando’s fingers started rubbing circled on my clit faster, his hips speeding up as well, his thrusts becoming feral and desperate as he brought me closer to my orgasm while also chasing his own.
I knew Lando was close when I felt him twist inside of me. One of his hands grasped my hair, lifting my head up. “Cum for me, baby!” He said with a slight growl.
That was all it took to tip me over the edge and I was cumming, tightening around nothing as Lando filled my ass up with his cum.
“Fuck baby, that was so hot!” Lando said, pulling his softening dick out of me with a wet pop once he slipped all the way outside. “Think we can do it again sometimes?”
“Yeah,” I said, finally allowing my body to collapse onto the bed. “We should definitely do it again sometimes.”
I heard shuffling and felt Lando getting off the bed. He slipped inside the bathroom, leaving the door open and then I heard the sound of water running.
He came back, offering me his hands and I grabbed them, allowing him to pull me up into a sitting position, slightly wincing at the ghost of pain. “I don’t think I can quiet walk yet, Lan.”
“That’s okay, baby.” He offered me a gentle smile before picking me up. Lando carried me to the bathroom and then gently put me down into the bathtub.
I moved a bit forward, making space for him to get in behind me which he did, and then leaned back, pressing my back against his chest. I hummed at the warm water, running my hands through the bubbles.
“You even made bubbles,” I said, my voice hoarse from how loud I had been.
Lando laughed, his hands gently caressing my skin as he leaned forward and placed a gentle kiss onto my cheek. “Of course I did. How could I forget how important the bubbles are for my girl? I love you, baby.”
I smiled, melting back into him, “I love you too, Lan.”
#f1 fic#dia's diner#f1 fanfic#f1 x reader#formula one imagine#f1 x female reader#f1 x you#formula 1 x reader#formula 1#formula 1 x you#lando norris fic#lando norris#lando norris x reader#lando x reader#lando norris x you#lando norris smut#ln4 imagine#ln4#ln4 fic#ln4 x reader#ln4 mcl#ln4 smut#lando smut
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𝑻𝑹𝑨𝑪𝑲 𝑶𝑵𝑬 💿 — 𝒎𝒆𝒆𝒕 𝒎𝒆 𝒊𝒏 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒉𝒂𝒍𝒍𝒘𝒂𝒚
rafe cameron x fem!reader | angst | (drug use, drug addiction, 1 mention of vomit & overdosing, happy ending cause i’m the worst with angst.)
masterlist.
︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶︶ ୨♡୧ ︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶︶
You couldn’t look away, no matter how badly you wanted to. His pupils were blown out, his nostrils were red and dripping, there was a slight swing to his jaw. You knew it was bad, but you’d never let yourself focus on it this much; you knew once you did there would be no going back.
Rafe was pacing back and forth, he’d started of with telling you a story about Topper but now he was on a self-pitying rant — the cocaine talk is on another level. He must’ve done at least a gram, you were certain there was a little bit of dry blood on his hands.
“You know I don’t want to be like this, right? Like, not that it’s that big of a deal, everyone does it, I mean even Top’s doin’ it at the moment. It’s not like I’m forty, I’m nineteen, I’m allowed to fuck up—” he rambled, hands waving about erratically as he spoke.
One thing he’s promised you when he first started the drug was that you’d never have to witness it, yet here he was in your bedroom off his head. This was your safe place, away from his angry outbursts during the withdrawals and constant need of reassurance during the come-downs.
“Rafe,” you interrupted, your voice exhausted yet snippy. He looked over at you, eyes wide. “What are you even talking about?”
“…what?” He murmured. It was clear he had no idea, and that just made you more pissed off.
“We were meant to be getting pizza and watching a movie,” you stated, tears springing to your eyes. He’d promised that you’d finally get a chill night to yourselves, but then again he always does.
“Yeah, order the food then,” he shrugged, grabbing his phone from the vanity to throw to you.
It landed on its screen, and the first thing you noticed was the white powder residue that had stuck onto his phone case. Your lip quivered, hands shaking as you shook your head and held the phone back to him.
“You won’t even be hungry. You’re off your fucking head,” you stated.
Rafe scoffed, rolling his eyes at your attitude. “No I’m not. I’ve been home all day.”
“Don’t bullshit me, Rafe!” You snapped, sitting up fully now as you stared daggers at him; trying to ignore the sting of your tears. “You’ve been with Barry, haven’t you?”
“I— I don’t get why it’s any of your business. You’re not my fuckin’ mom. I’m a grown man, I can do what I want,” he argued, voice raising.
“I can’t do this anymore.” You weren’t even sure the words were going to come out, but the second they did you felt a horrifying feeling; relief. Relief that you’d finally spoken your mind, relief that you weren’t allowing yourself to live in constant fear anymore.
Every moment you couldn’t get ahold of Rafe, night or day, you had a vivid image of him on the floor, choking on his own vomit after doing one too many lines. You’d told him once, in the safety of your covers, and he’d told you to stop being so damn dramatic. The problem was that you weren’t being dramatic, and him overdosing was a perfectly reasonable worry for you to have.
“What?” He asked, after a moment of silence where he’d just stared at you as if you’d lost your mind.
“I can’t do it,” you repeated, voice breaking. “I love you, but I refuse to be in a relationship where all I do is worry about you.”
“That’s- that’s not fuckin’ fair, baby. Don’t do that. You know I love you.” He was on the bed now, panic in his eyes as he crawled towards you and tried to grab at your hands. “I have a problem, okay? I know that. I’ll work on it, I promise. Just don’t do this, okay? You don’t want that, you don’t want to leave me.”
“It’s not about leaving you, Rafe,” you sob, now allowing your tears to freely fall. “It’s about putting myself first. I don’t want to feel like this anymore. We can’t even have one night without you being on it!”
“That’s not true! I’m not on it right now!” The fact he continued to lie just made things worse, and just made you stick with the decision you’d made.
“I want you to leave,” you said quietly.
He shook his head, reaching forward to wipe your tears with his thumbs. “No. I’m not leavin’. We’re not doing this. I need help, okay? I need help.”
“You may know you need help, but are you ready to get it?” The silence that followed was answer enough. “I want you to leave.”
Tears streamed down both your cheeks, he shook his head as he gripped onto your face. “Please— don’t do this, baby, please. I don’t want to leave, I don’t want to lose you—”
“Then sort yourself out,” you stated bluntly, pulling away from his hold. “And once you do, we’ll talk.”
It looked like he was going to argue again, beg you to change your mind, but the look in your eyes told him it was no use. You’d decided, and deep down he completely understood why.
He got up from your bed, lip quivering and tears down his pale cheeks. He grabbed his phone and keys from your vanity and looked back at you, you refused to look at him. He stepped out of your room and closed the door behind him, collapsing against your bedroom door with a sob.
︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶︶ ୨♡୧ ︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶︶
You hadn’t expected to hear from him right away, and you definitely weren’t going to be the first to reach out, but you didn’t think that five months would go by without a word. You hung in different circles, the last time you saw him was three months ago at the country club where you’d swiftly locked yourself in the bathroom to sob.
“Hey.” Your whole body stiffened at the familiar voice that you hadn’t heard in so long, your head swivelled round.
He looked different, he looked healthy. He’d gained the weight back in his face and his hair was buzzed short. You hadn’t seen him whatsoever, so you almost let out a gasp at the new look.
“Hi,” you replied softly, fingers tightening around the red-solo cup in your hand.
“Can we talk?” He asked. If he’d ever asked that before, you’d know that it wasn’t a question. It was a demand. But now it really felt like he was asking, it really felt like you had the option.
“Um… yeah. I just need to bring these drinks to the girls,” you explained, nodding to the table where you’d filled up multiple cups with vodka and orange-juice.
“Sure. Meet me in the hallway in five?” He questioned, giving you a smile. You felt yourself nodding your head, mirroring his expression.
You took the drinks over to your friends, you told a little white-lie and said you were going to the bathroom. They didn’t know the ins and outs of yours and Rafe’s relationship, but they knew how broken you were at the end of it; they wouldn’t understand.
He was leant against the wall, nibbling on his bottom lip as if he was nervous. When his eyes landed on you, he smiled softly and took a step forward to meet you halfway.
“Hey,” he greeted, again.
“Hi,” you murmured, looking up at him. “You shaved your hair.”
“Wanted a change,” he shrugged, running his hand over his buzzed head with a sheepish smile. “You like it?”
Surprisingly, you found yourself nodding. You’d always loved his hair, loved running your fingers through it or sleepily watching him sort it in the mornings. But the buzz cut made him look more mature, and that was something you never thought you’d see.
“I haven’t seen you in ages,” you stated quietly. You’d refused to ask his friends where he was when you saw them at parties and the club, if you did it would only be proving you missed him.
“Yeah, uh, I spent a few months off the island,” he explained slowly, keeping his eyes on yours. “Went to rehab.”
“What?” You weren’t sure you’d heard him right, eyes widening slightly and heart racing. “You went to rehab?”
He smiled at you, nodding. “It was unhealthy and I needed to stop before I lost anything else.”
“So you’re sober?” You asked hopefully, praying this wasn’t some kind of cruel trick; a way to get his revenge for you leaving him behind.
“Yeah, I’m sober. Off the booze, too. Drinking water,” he laughed, waving his cup around.
“What are you doing at a party then?”
He scratched the back of his neck, letting out a soft chuckle. “Uh, well, I only got back last night and I was going to try and go to your place but Top texted saying you were here.”
“Why are you here to see me?” You asked, heart stuttering in your chest.
“Because I fucked up, and you’re owed the biggest apology out of anyone. But mostly I wanted to show you who I am now, and who I want to be… with you,” he explained, voice soft and quiet.
Your eyes shone with tears as he stepped closer to you, one hand wrapping around your waist and the other cupping your cheek. You gave him a wobbly smile.
“I love you, so fucking much. These last few months have been hell, for a multitude of reasons, but all I could think about was you. I treated you badly, and I understand if you never want to see me again, but I’m begging you to give me another chance. To let me treat you how I should have from the start,” he said, wiping away a tear that dripped down your cheek.
“Okay,” you agreed, voice wavering with emotion. “I want that.”
A grin broke out on his face, his lips latching onto yours. The kiss was gentle, full of love and a thousand apologises. He pulled away first, his forehead leaning against yours. “I love you.”
“I love you, too,” you murmured back. “Come on, let’s get the hell out of here.”
“Already? Someone’s eager,” he teased, making you swat at his chest with an amused smile. “I’m kiddin’. How ‘bout we go get some pizza and watch a movie?”
You nodded your head, arms looping around his neck. “Sounds perfect.”
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